Do I wake or sleep?

So we had two shows on Friday, at 8 and 11, and then the Saturday show at the Strand in Lakewood.  Thanks to New Jersey Transit's stellar service, I got there much later than I intended to again.  Some genius decided to rip up 14th Street which brought traffic going over the bridge to a complete halt.  I finally got off as soon as we made it past the bridge, knowing I could scooter faster--much faster--than the bus was going.  Everyone on the bus was pissed off about it.

But since I'd left even earlier on Friday, it could've been worse--I got there in enough time to have a more relaxed warm up session, and skank up even better!  The 8pm show went well--Susan was there and loved it.  She was talking about me to Kelly Anne, who plays Magenta, saying I was the hardest-working, most disciplined performer she knew.  Kelly Anne was all "I know!  She came up with a back story for her character!  Who DOES that for Rocky Horror?"

I finally got used to the stage--it's still not ideal for tapping (can't hear the sounds at all) but I felt very comfortable on it, and stayed in the moment and just enjoyed it.  LOVE my tap solo, I am sad not to be doing it any more! 



The 11pm show went even better than the 8, and we had the biggest crowd for that one.  Chris was still resistant to callbacks; at one point, he was talking about how he would race through that incredibly dense chunk of text where he is expositing about the transducer.

With callbacks, the dialogue should go:

Dr. Scott: This Sonic Transducer, it is I suppose, some kind of audio-vibratory, physio-molecular, transport device?

Brad: You mean...?

Audience: A VIBRATOR?

Dr. Scott: Yes Brad, it’s something we ourselves have been working on for quite some time. But it seems our friend here has found a means of perfecting it.

Audience:  A PERFECT VIBRATOR? 

Dr. Scott: A device which is capable of breaking down solid matter and then projecting it through space and who knows, perhaps even time itself!

Audience: A PERFECT, PORTABLE VIBRATOR?

Okay, properly done, this is hilarious.  But Chris just raced through it, cutting off the callbacks.  Dude, this is FUNNY.  Have fun with the show.  This is not Shakespeare, it's the Rocky Fucking Horror Show.  There's no point to doing it without the callbacks!  It almost makes me want to do another role (Columbia doesn't get much yelled at her) so I can roll with the punches.  Certainly Jennifer (also a virgin, played Janet) never let it bother her!

We got out of the 11pm show at 1am.  Luckily we didn't have to wait too long for the bus and a train, but still, I got home at close to 3 am.  I dragged myself out of bed the next morning at 8:45--I had to be at Port Authority at 10:30, we were all going to catch the 11:00 bus to Lakewood.  I tried to sleep on the bus but it made a LOT of stops and sleep was impossible.  The snow started almost as soon as we left the city but didn't stick.

The Strand Theater is HUGE.  I think the house holds a 1000 seats!  Robert had mapped out an agenda which turned out to be over-ambitious.  We were supposed to do a cue-to-cue from 2-3, then have a bit of a break, eat dinner, then do a runthrough, then relax before our performance.  Oh no--we didn't finish the cue-to-cue until close to 5.  Robert tried to call a full runthrough and he nearly had an actor mutiny--we were all starving by then.  So we went through only the first act and then chilled backstage.  At one point Kelly Anne and I were talking and she asked me what the plot of Twelfth Night was (it came up somehow, and I told her she was the right type to play Maria).  We talked about that and other Shakespeare--she's done some straight theater but no classical, I don't think.


Check out our head mikes!

The audience at the Strand LOVED us. It was more than appreciation--they were grateful.  At one point we had an emergency--during "There's a Light (Over at the Frankenstein Place)" the stage lights and music were cut and we were told to go backstage.  A board member came backstage and told us that they'd had a slight emergency and were holding the show briefly.  Then the board member started raving about how good we were, so professional and talented, the best they'd ever had...very nice to hear!  She actually touched me on the shoulder in a very sincere gesture, this is what I mean about seeming grateful.  Very sweet.  The audience was raving about us at intermission as well, I had several photograph requests.

I was able to get out in enough time to catch the 10:30 bus back, which arrived much quicker than I antici------pated.  12!  I was expecting 12:30 so yay for a whole half-hour!  I crashed and have been crashing ever since--SEVERE sleep deprivation last week and have slept upwards of 11 hours a day the past few days.  The cast has been sending gooey, mass "aw, you guys, I loved working with you so much!" emails and Kelly Anne is planning a cast party.

So I've been reading about how badly Irene hit upstate New York, so I definitely want to plan an apple-picking/pumpkin-patching trip sometime soon, so we can give them our money! Gotta look after our agrarian brothers and sisters...

Rocky Horror Show auditions--as I mentioned, I heard a couple of weeks ago that they'd be bringing it back, minus a few cast members. I told Dave I would be very interested in auditioning for Columbia--I said I could tap some, but my weakness was picking up choreography quickly. This is because of my training--I'm hyperliterate (started reading at a very young age and read voraciously), and as an actor and as a classically trained singer, I've been taught to look at the page first. But dancers don't learn this way--they learn with their feet. Even with my athletic background, it's not as easy for me--there's a whole extra step in the learning process for me that trained dancers don't have, which really slows me down at auditions. When I was in rehearsal for my ship contract, we ran up against this with our choreographer when Aly and I were taught the Land of a Thousand Dances combination. One of the easiest combinations ever--just the dance steps that are outlined in the song (Pony, Chicken, Mashed Potato, etc.)--but we didn't know some of those steps and after an already exhausting day, not much was sinking in and it took us forever to learn the sequence. I was begging the choreography (Stacy?) to just STOP and let me write down the steps--I kept trying to explain to her that singers learn differently. But she didn't understand and just kept drilling us.

I make up for this lack by working my ASS off in rehearsal. No one who sees me dance in a show will ever see anything less than the most polished performance I can give. Susan can tell you, when she and I did shows together, I was constantly pulling her aside and making her breakdown sequences for me. Since I'm not nearly as strong a dancer as I am a singer, I can't get away with anything--I have to work TWICE as hard. At any rate, Dave seemed interested...then the following week I saw the audition notice go up on Facebook. Columbia was not listed, so I thought gee, I guess the other girl is coming back, and I emailed Dave. He said no, I was still in the running and Robert needed to see me tap.

So I did my homework. I hadn't tapped in over ten years, so I took a couple of classes at Steps on Broadway. They have Basic Tap on Saturday and Sunday mornings. (I cannot get over how inexpensive dance classes are--$17 a class! Susan thinks it's a ripoff but I'm comparing it to voice lessons which are easily $80 and up in NYC.) The one on Saturday was with an older black woman and there was just me and on other dancer in the class, so it was almost like a private session. She certainly knew her stuff but it was very, very detailed, small, micro-teaching, focused on technique. We didn't learn any combinations. The class the next day was more like a traditional tap class, with a lot more people (at least 25) and a guy at the front showing us the steps, breaking them down, and then combining them together. He went kind of fast but I'm proud to say I was able to keep up, although I was fudging some of those steps at the end! (Although it helped that I already knew how to do a time-step.) I really enjoyed the Sunday class and found it more helpful--what I need most is to build my tap repertoire and learn steps like back essences and the waltz clog.

The next day I called Susan and asked if she could help me--originally I asked her to make up a tap combination and teach it to me quickly, under audition conditions, so I could get back into that mode. This evolved into my learning Columbia's combination from the movie. I found a breakdown of the steps online and then we compared it with the few clips of the combo that are on YouTube. (Richard O'Brien obviously polices his show quite thoroughly! Clips of RHPS are not easy to find online.) I learned it and was even able to do it a tempo after a couple of days--it wasn't pretty but I did learn it! Most of it looked fine but the chaine turns--turns are NOT my forte! I don't spot very well...

Robert has been sick at last week but was finally better for the weekend and we set up an audition appointment at his place, for Sunday evening. Saturday was my first volunteer shift for RightRides which was fun but EXHAUSTING. I did not get into bed until 5:30 am! So rehearsal for the reading of The Empress of Sex was not easy, because I was trying VERY hard not to fall asleep. After rehearsal I went over to Susan's apartment and tarted myself up good with fishnets, dance shorts and lots of glittuh eye makeup. And I did my hair in messy ponytails--I was going for the "kid who's stayed a little too long at the rave" look for my Columbia. I warmed up at Susan's place and on the train (which naturally took forever). When I got to Robert's place (his apartment is adorable, nice little restored ground floor place in the Heights), he got right to work and tested me on a battery of steps, including double-time steps, back flaps, and various shuffle and ball-change mini-combinations. At one point he asked me "can you do [ describes lunge-shuffle step]" I said "do you mean maxies? Sure." *execute right and left maxies* He asked if I could do wings--I said No! He asked if I could fake them--I hesitated and then, figuring the fake would be most convincing the closer my feet were to the ground, relaxed my legs from the knees down and then whipped out a fake wing. He said, good! Can you do two in a row? Sure. *does so, then does 3 in a row* He said to me in amazement, who knew you could tap?! I said well, I haven't done it in a while but yes, I have tapped in several shows. I was trying to remember them all--I started with Me and My Girl, then The Boyfriend ("Perfect Young Ladies" which technically was not tap as I did not have on tap shoes for that number since I was in the preceding scene but the technique was all tap and the other dancers, when they entered, all had on tap shoes. I *still* remember that combination!), Lucky Stiff ("Welcome back, Mr. Witherspoon!" *stomp, STOMP* "MIS-ter WITH-er-spoon...we always knew you'd be...BACK..." *stomp, shuffle, shuffle, shuffle, stomp, ball-CHANGE*). I know I did another tap show as well but it's escaping me right now. ANYWAY, Robert said you've got the part. YAAAAAYYYYY!!!!!

So so excited!!! I love it that this is a DANCE role, my very first one! (That is, my very first dance principal.) I mean, it's not Anita or anything but it's a by-God DANCE role. And I wanted it and I worked for it and I got it!

Robert told me where to find a rehearsal video of the combination so I looked it up--other than the wings, it'll be easy!

Susan and I were talking on the phone last night about the arrangements for tonight. Somehow the story of our first NYC email exchange came up, which goes like this: Susan and I had done many shows together down in Virginia, she as a dancer, I as a singer. Eventually she started getting dance gigs in more exotic locations--I believe she first went to Japan in 1995. I had her address for awhile and somehow lost it amid MY numerous moves (moved in '94, '95, twice in '97, big-ass move in '99 when I accepted the cruise ship gig, THREE TIMES in 2000...). A mutual friend of ours gave me her current email, saying she lived in the city. I emailed her, asking where she was living, and she replied with the subject line DID YOU KNOW YOUR NEIGHBORHOOD VAS TAINTED? (She and I give each other shit about how representative we are of our respective ethnic groups. I am Aryana; she is the classic JP.)

From there the conversation went to the book I read last winter, The Jews of Prime Time, and the parlor game of "Is s/he or isn't s/he?" According to the book, Rachel Green on Friends has not definitively been established as Jewish, although there are clues given that hint at her being so including her name (the book says Green is a classic "ISOIS?" name and of course color names--Rosen, Schwartz, Black--are often Jewish). Which got me to thinking--I wonder if anyone ever wondered that about me? My mother once told me that Grandpa Butch (my dad's dad) sometimes got asked at Princeton, but as far as I know (and we can trace it back pretty far), the Greens have been WASPs forever. I told Susan I'd LOVE that if someone...maybe...wondered...is she or isn't she? I'd love to get some of that attributed ethnicity. I'd kick ass if I had some Russian Jewish blood. I would be strutting all over the city. Hey! I fucking ROCK with my Jewish ancestry!

I won't put down my Northern European, Christian ancestry--I'm proud of that too. But how cool would it be to have something a little different in there?

I think I have the opposite of the Helsinki syndrome. But I love my name now.

Saturday I was able to sleep late, until 12:30. I slugged around the apartment for awhile, struggling to wake up, and then I scrubbedscrubbedscrubbed the place. It is clean. Finally around 5:30 I left to get a manicure and pedicure. The thing is, when I sleep so late my day is cut in half and I can't do most of the things I want to. I couldn't tan, or make the ice cream, or update my resume. Annoying!

I feel a deep sense of relief that my evenings are relatively free, and soon my days will be as well. Sleeping in Tomorrow was not what I'd hoped--I really don't think my vision was realized on stage and it's incredibly frustrating. Yes, a chunk of that was due to Ehud the Unprofessional Shmactor but sadly, L___ and W___ were not what I'd hoped either. W___ was doing an okay--not great but serviceable--job until the run started and then he started overmotivating every line. Dude, we worked on this. Remember? We had several rehearsals where I talked about how things were supposed to sound. Extremely frustrating. L_____ was even more frustrating, because she's genuinely talented, but a flake. She simply cannot remember direction, or rather it takes more time to drill it into her than I had.

But. The bulk of the disappointment must be reserved for that unprofessional piece of shit, Ehud Segev. He showed up late, as in 2 minutes before curtain late. (And he showed up 25 minutes late for a rehearsal, munching on pizza nonchalantly.) He changed blocking and lines at will. He consistently tried to pull focus. His line readings suck. "She DIDN'T choke on ONE of mah TOFU-balls, did SHE?" "Still, you should never, NEVER speak of fame disparagingly." He never did his homework--didn't learn either his lines or his notes. Nor did he ever bother to learn the correct pronunciation for his children's names. He talked loudly enough on his cell phone backstage to be heard by actors onstage (unspeakably inconsiderate). He thinks he's the shit as an actor, and therefore argued with every goddamn thing I told him to do. And worst of all, his attitude sucks ass. He doesn't care about the craft, about creating art or even a workable performance piece. He just cares about how he looks, and promoting his stupid show. Ehud Segev, get out of the business. You don't belong here. Stick to pulling pencils out of your nose.

I hope his name is Googled by potential directors, and this comes up. I thought I was resigned to how shitty his work had been, and how much he'd tainted the experience for me, until yesterday, talking to Susan about it. I was literally shaking, I was getting so angry. I gave everyone in the cast my traditional duckling gift (this time, they were duckling bathtub stickers) and for the first time I left out a cast member. I didn't make a big ceremony of it, I simply pulled people aside and gave them their duckling, so I didn't embarrass him--oh wait, since he didn't show up until 5 minutes to curtain, I'm sure it didn't matter. But I simply cannot be a hypocrite and pretend "Hey, no hard feelings," even to be polite. I can't do it. There are hard feelings.

Anyway. Breathe in, breathe out. Let the anger go.

The Shakespeare showcase is gonna be awesome.

Last night I went to a showcase at the Trisha Brown Dance Studio, presented for the benefit of a guy that Susan and I met last Saturday at a party. Guy's name is Stephan--he's an acrobat/dancer, and he's going off to Las Vegas for a couple of years to develop and perform in a new Cirque du Soleil show. Anyway, I showed up at 8:30 and tried to squeeze into the room where the showcase was happening. Most of the acts were excellent--I was truly surprised at how good the show was. There was a bellydancer who was phenomenal, a couple of musclemen/acrobats who elicited gasps from the audience, a sword-swallower, a swing-dancer duo (who needed to smile more but they were still great). There was also an 11-year-old girl who had a Broadway resume--she was cute but I didn't like her singing style (I usually don't with most Broadway kids--it's such a nasal, harsh sound with forced vibrato).

There was a couple of acts that I thought didn't live up to the others. One was the final act--Stephan and his partner were supposed to be the final act but I guess this guy got there late or something. Anyway he just had to sing for Stephan. I didn't like his style either--he was one of those singers where it's all about him--bending over, eating the mike, closing the eyes, no communion with the audience. Ick. Just--no. Stop showboating, just sing the damn song. Then when his song was over, he had another song to sing. Oh man, whatever. It's bad enough you had to be the final act instead of Stephan but if you just have to sing, keep it to one song. Good Lord.

Anyway, the other act I didn't like was this guy who called himself "Father Tigger" (?), and strode out to this pumping song wearing some sort of modified priest's jacket and collar. He performed this--dance? performance piece? whatever--wherein he pulled out things like a rosary, a wooden cross necklace, etc., and fondled them, mouthed them, scourged himself and them threw them aside. It was nauseating, not because it made fun of the RC church, but because it was childish. The whole tone was so self-congratulatorily naughty--ooh, look at me! I'm fondling crosses and rosaries! I'm badd!! I'm daring!!

And it's not as though it were original or bold--Madonna's worked that shtick to death. I have no problem whatsoever with intelligent, cogent criticism or satire of the Church, be it RC or any other denomination. Sister Mary Ignatius Explains It All for You is one of my favorite plays, because it balances truly hilarious satire with honest outrage and bewilderment. But say something intelligent--say something other than Church Bad. The whole act was so artistically lazy--dress up like a priest, fondle yourself, get a few cheap laughs. Luckily I wasn't the only one put off by it--as I was leaving I heard the guy talking to someone who said he'd seen quite a few raised eyebrows in the audience, and the guy responded "That doesn't faze me a bit." I'm sure it doesn't because after all, you're a bold new voice! You're challenging long-held notions of the infallibility of the Church, you're shaking us out of our religious comfort zone, you're saying what's never been said before! Wow--the Church isn't always right! Who knew? Lead us, o Father Tigger!! Be our voice!

Vomit.