Do I wake or sleep?

I was on the train to work yesterday afternoon, and got out at Columbus Circle to transfer to the D or B, both of which go to my final stop. There were muffled announcements about the D, something about its having been rerouted, which were confirmed when the D came trundling down the local line (it is normally express). They kept the D cooling its wheels for at least 7 minutes as the conductor explained, over and over, to passengers that that D would be running along a different line (8th Avenue) instead of along 6th Avenue. Fine, then GET GOING. As long as they stayed there, the B train (a local) couldn't come in. Then another D came in, and stayed there. During this time at least 6 A trains came and went. SO ANNOYING.

Finally a B came along and I got in. I guess the excessive delay had unhinged some people because I could hear some woman speaking very sharply to someone on the other end of the car. "No, you shut up. No, shut up." In one of those hideous Brooklyn accents--in fact she sounded quite like The Fungus (I could tell it wasn't she, though). She kept going on, and I could hear another woman trying to explain "If you'd just said that at the beginning, I wouldn't have bothered you--" She kept trying to explain herself or defuse the situation, but Brooklyn Accent wasn't having it and kept cutting her off. The whole car was listening (she was pretty loud). She was saying something like "Don't you EVUH cawl anothuh woman a bitch! How dayuh you!"

I had to be at the other end of the car anyway so I started edging my way down to one of the middle doors (I couldn't get all the way to the other end, the car was too packed). So I stopped at one of the middle doors and just as the other woman seemed to have decided it was pointless to try to say anything to Brooklyn Accent. But then someone else decided to take up the slack--some guy, younger (maybe in his late 20s) with an iPod asked her "Have you taken your meds?" She snarled "This has nothing to do with you." He said "You've involved the whole car because you're incredibly annoying. You need to be shut the fuck up." She said something about "Your mothuh" and he responded "Oh, 'your mother' jokes, really? How original." This went on for a bit--he just kept shutting her down with these unflappable responses. It was pretty entertaining. I wanted to point out to her the hypocrisy in her first saying "don't call women bitches" and then insulting some guy's mother. I did get a better look at Brooklyn Accent--she even looks a bit like The Fungus! Reddish, messy hair, pasty skin, a few extra pounds. How horrifying to think there's more than one.

So the Friday morning commute from hell? Was apparently planned. Part of a planned, calculated middle finger to commuters, to punish us for what their crappy management is doing. If their aim is to underscore how worthless and without honor most TWU members are, and to get NYC commuters to side with MAT management, well then excellent job, me hearties!

Fire them all. Every last worthless one of them.

Went to the TRU auditions Saturday and saw Catherine Lamm and had a nice long chat with her about the court case and Macbeth. We enjoyed chewing over every juicy bit of the case, and of course talked about Julie quite a bit. First of all, get this--Catherine is some kind of bigwig with TRU, I believe her official title for the auditions was "Casting Coordinator" or something like that. In the past Julie has attended TRU auditions to cast for Lovestreet--in fact one year I sat in for her. This year I wanted to go but I also didn't want to run into Julie, have her come up to me and fake like we're still cool. Julie, we're not. She's trapped other Macbeth actors before--Lori was cornered in the Drama Desk Bookstore once--and I just didn't want to deal with it.

When I got to the auditions, I had to wait a bit for a break before I could go into the room, so Emileena and I chatted a bit. I asked to see the list of auditors and noticed Julie was not on it--I was all YES! Then when I finally entered and sat down, Duncan told me the dish--apparently Catherine got Julie barred from the auditions. Catherine confirmed it, she said she told TRU "I won't be here if she's here" so they asked Julie to leave. Duh-ra-ma! I love it.

Catherine was talking about what a great job we'd all done, especially the Witches--"I loved you Witches"--then she dropped a bombshell that really took me aback. In fact I'm not at all sure how to take this. She said that during the rehearsal process, Julie had been trying to get Catherine to fire ME. This--seems off. For one thing, Julie had absolutely no grounds for that--Catherine said she refused, saying "you'll have to give me a reason, she's doing great work." (When I asked Catherine what reason Julie had given, Catherine shrugged and said "Because you're good and she's not?" Well, thank you, that is a nice compliment but did Julie really say that? And God knows, Michelle and Lori were also fantastic. At any rate, Julie never came off as the jealous type to me. Insecure as hell, sure, but not jealous.) For another, I've helped Julie on many, many occasions--I convinced her not to cancel the show when PsychoSusan melted down, I've done benefits for her, as I mentioned I've sat in for her, I've even taken her out for her birthday. Julie's weird but would she really 1) dick over someone who'd helped her out that much--attack me that personally?, and 2) risk a complete mutiny in the cast, since she'd already fired the first director, Lew? Also, Julie came after me several months later, asking me to come back to Lovestreet. Of course she could've done a turnaround but still, I just don't know if I buy this. Another thing that strikes me as off is that--well, if Julie wanted to, she could fire anyone she wanted herself--she doesn't have to go through the director, she's the producer. Very odd. Part of me wonders if Catherine weren't mixing me up with someone else in the cast. She knew the Witches as a unit, she never really got to know us individually.

At any rate, I'm much less upset about it than I thought I'd be--partly because it just seems so off, and partly because it was awhile ago.

On another note, I'm really glad I went to the TRU auditions. Duncan is not so enthralled with them as I, but there's something inspirational in a grassroots organization that tries to empower each other. (And besides, they catered the auditions with Amy's Bread.) I got all excited about maybe doing something this summer--I think I'm going to talk to someone at Columbia to inquire about the possibility of doing an outdoor show there this summer, maybe a very-staged reading. Maybe even Julius Caesar or Antony and Cleopatra, since I've been studying them! Plus you get awesome fights with that. Melissa (R&J baby) wants fights.

So today after waiting damn near 10 minutes for a downtown 1 train (while seeing no fewer than 3 uptown trains go up the opposite track), one finally came and of course it was packed. Fuck you very much, MTA! Which meant when we pulled into 96th Street and saw a waiting 3 train, a lot of people piled into it. Which meant the 3 train was also very crowded.

Which meant it was a BAD TIME to shuffle your way through the car rattling your stupid cup and muttering "give to [blah blah blah] charity." The guy was shoving past us! And of course no one gave him any money. Jerk.

So this morning I'm on the 1 train which took forever to come and as a result was very crowded. This happens every so often, the trains just back up or something. We all squeeze in and stand there--one guy gets on at 125th with a HUGE backpack--on his back, which is smacking into people who are giving him glares. Somebody snotted "Why don't you take that off?" and he said (nicely) "well, I would but then it would be on people's feet." I refrained from pointing out, the way to do that is to put it on your OWN feet and hold it with your knees. Because dude, it is hitting people. We suffered until 96th Street, which is when I can usually get a seat because everyone transfers over to the express trains there. I sit down in one of the disabled/elderly seats and start reading. Now last night I was riding home and a young-ish (20s) woman was in one of those seats, and a guy came on with a cane and was leaning against the door at the end of the train (so, right near her, because those seats are at the end of the car). I noticed he was looking at her from time to time, and then he started lifting his cane in what seemed to me a rather pointed manner. She never noticed though, and it wasn't because she was in her own world--she was chatting away gaily with a friend of hers about 2 feet away from the cane guy. Now, I don't know if he was deliberately trying to get her attention--in which case, dude, just say "could I please have that seat?" rather than just hoping she'll notice--but I still thought she was tacky.

Well, this morning I'm in the hot seat, reading, and I look around every now and then to see if there are any disabled/elderly people who need a seat. It's all good until 66th Street--a woman gets on and stands right in front of me, and she looks to be a little pregnant. That is, she appeared to be "sticking out" in front, she had a slight bulge--it was difficult to tell though, because she had on a coat. We look at each other a couple of times (and she was right in front of me) so I start feeling like...am I missing something? Should I offer her a seat? So finally I say "Excuse me, would you like my seat?" She looks down at me for a second. One word. "No." (Not rudely or angrily, but shortly.) Oh man. I guess she wasn't pregnant. Oh MAN. Awkward. I felt my face go red and I just blushed until, mercifully, 50th Street came up. Of course we BOTH got off on that stop.

So far the strike has barely affected me. I live within walking distance of work (in fact I walk every day to work), as well as all the other locations I need to get to this week: Madison Square Garden/Penn Station, grocery store, etc. If anything I've had a net gain from the strike, since I worked yesterday for someone who lives in Bay Ridge (!!--there's no way she's getting in, Bay Ridge is at the end of the world. Even on the train it takes an hour to get in). I have been monitoring coverage on NY1--they're reporting lots of anecdotes about people reacting to the situation, but so far it seems there has been no scientific poll on how many commuters/average New Yorkers support the strike (or at least the strikers). I am very curious--it seems there's more support than I would've thought, but it's hard to tell. Ryan and I were talking about it last night at the hockey game--he feels as I do, that the terrible level of service that many MTA workers give erodes much sympathy we might otherwise feel for a union worker. He told one horror story of waiting on the platform for 45 minutes while workers puttered along the rails and manned the booth and the platform filled up with people. Finally someone yelled down to the workers on the rails where the train was. The guy replied there was no service along that line. Ryan was pissed all over again telling the story--the workers saw the platform filling up with people, the booth workers saw all those people go past the turnstile, and no one said anything. For 45 minutes. And the TWU wants to reduce employee disciplinary actions? How about reducing the need for disciplinary actions, Roger? How about demanding a higher quality of service from your workers so the MTA doesn't have to go after them, in response to the flood of complaints they get from riders? I noticed after the TWU was meeting with skepticism about some of their pension and benefit demands from workers who don't get compensated nearly as well--so then they started talking about "it's not about that, it's about respect." Oh bullshit. That's just an attempt to cloud the issue, because it's more difficult to quantify "respect" than benefits or pay. How about treating the riders with respect? One time I was on the platform for over 20 minutes at 1 am--the train still hadn't arrived, so I went to the booth which backed up to the platform. I tried to wave to the booth worker so she'd turn around and she ignored me. I then tapped on the plastic and she snarled "Don't do that. Come around." I told her I didn't want to exit the system and have to pay again and she sighed rudely and said "I'll let you back in." Don't fucking sigh and roll your eyes at me like it's a pain in the ass to answer my questions. And if you don't want people tapping on the glass, either keep an eye out for them or face the other way. Jesus! You are there to help people!

And you know what--I've worked service jobs too, and it's not easy. There are some real assholes out there and I know that. But when I worked those jobs, I didn't get paid even half as well as the transit workers. I certainly never got a pension or benefits from all the promos I've done, from working at Burger King and Baskin Robbins and Dart Drug and Talbot's when I was a teenager. See, that's the tradeoff--yes, it's not an easy job but you're getting paid pretty damn well, enough that you can be polite when a customer wants to ask you something.

The MTA sucks too, though--I am a little worried that the strike will engender undeserved support for them. I think they've run the system so poorly in the past 4 years or so, with insane jumps in the fares ($1.50 to $2? A 33% jump? Maddening) and a lot of poor decisions. And of course I think the holiday fare reduction is a terrible idea--way to give back to the tourists instead of the commuters! Last summer when I was rehearsing for Midsummer, I had to take the train up to the lower Bronx frequently--the commute was AWFUL. I used to arrive at Saturday rehearsals in tears because I would be so late because of unannounced service changes, and trains that were unexpectedly local instead of express. In fact the very last day of the run the train service just stopped at the end of Manhattan and we had to take a shuttle bus to my stop--an extremely crowded shuttle absolutely jam-packed with people. Naturally this added a good half-hour or more to the commute. AWFUL. I hate the MTA.

Yesterday the MTA did a really cool thing--they left one seat on every bus empty to honor Rosa Parks. They put up posters asking that people not sit there in her honor. I love that idea, and I think they should do it every year--that would mean more to me than a statue or another kind of conventional honor. It's very organic.

The Daily News did a followup on the story, seeing how many New Yorkers were willing to let a seat go empty during rush hour. Most of them were--it really warms my heart to hear some of their responses, like

After realizing she'd sat in the symbolic seat, 83-year-old Edith Green quickly moved to the other side of an M-1 bus heading down Fifth Ave. "It would be an honor," she said. "I'll gladly move. She was such a courageous woman."

Isn't that sweet? 83 years old and she's willing to move. And this:

Moments later, Fatima Reeves, 18, boarded the bus, glanced at the poster and sat down, her back pressed against the paper placard. She later said she didn't notice the print asking riders not to use the space.

"I apologize," Reeves said. "I think it's great to honor her. She changed history."

M-1 bus passenger Barbara Gatje, 74, made the same mistake and quickly slid over. "Here you go, Rosa," she said, patting the empty seat. "Her spirit's right here."

I LOVE that. And an 18 year old--that's awesome. It makes up for the guy on the Real World: Back to New York in 2000 who didn't even know who Rosa Parks was.

The one mean-spirited person (there's always someone) was a British tourist:

Fiona Humphreys won't move to the back of the bus - not even for Rosa Parks.
Told she was sitting in a symbolic seat reserved for Parks on city buses yesterday to honor the 50th anniversary of the day the civil rights legend refused to move to the back of a Montgomery, Ala., bus, Humphreys refused to get up.

The 55-year-old British tourist riding the M-1 bus said she knew of Parks, but added, "I think I've got a right to sit here."

Jerk. But the Daily News had a big-ass picture of her in the print edition, so I bet she gets a few remarks today, heh heh heh.

Friday evening I left work a little early to go see Paula in Ragtime. I took the W (an express train) to 36th St. and then transferred to the R but it still wasn't enough to get me to the theater on time. Jason (into whom I ran on the train) and I were wandering for quite some time in the darkness before blundering toward the entrance. Very confusing. Luckily they'd held the curtain and we didn't miss anything.

Paula of course was quite good, if under-utilized. One thing I noted was how crisply she executed the very simple choreography--she made the choreo look good, the mark of a true performer. She also pulled this random HIGH kick from out of her ass in the "Gettin' Ready Rag" and then selfishly refused to repeat it. I was left hanging! I had no idea she had such extension--talk about the vacuum packed-snatch (a joke between Susan and me--Susan would do stretches in the dressing room at the Lazy Susan, a craptastic dinner theater where we met and did many shows, and Susan's extension is from God. She'd pull her legs so far apart, we would joke about her vacuum packed-snatch).

Typically, the community theater talent was uneven. Sarah was probably the best, but I hated the way she performed "Your Daddy's Son." Sang it beautifully but grimaced and mugged her way through the song. Girl, the emotion is written into the song. You don't have to add anything--just sing the song. It was too much. Coalhouse was pretty good but he had this distracting habit of twisting his mouth (and opening it very wide) when he sang. Father was actually pretty good but he was in the wrong show. Completely miscast--short and slight when he needs to look domineering (or at least like a leading man), and the dude had a very noticeable lisp. It's too bad because he was actually quite funny in the "What a Game" number. The guy's a character actor. Stay away from WASP patrician roles. Mother's Younger Brother was pretty good. Tateh got on my nerves quite a bit--in some scenes he was pretty good and was really able to lose himself, and in others he displayed a colorful variety of tics and twitches that made me want to shake him. Tateh's Little Girl was absolutely precious and I need to adopt her. Along with Coalhouse Walker III.

Mother was really boring in the role--it's a boring part that translates better to screen than to stage, because Mother is gentle, thoughtful, respectful--undramatic. And she gets a lot of thoughtful ballads that are--boring. That said, a good actress can bring some passion and fire to the role, but this was not that actress. She also has a good voice underneath that break somewhere--it was hard listening to her because I kept wondering "can she support this note? Is she going to flip into her chest voice mid-note?" She would do well with a really good voice teacher because she does have a good instrument under all that. "Back to Before" should be this soaring journey of realization. She should be re-experiencing her change from dependent "wife of" to independent woman--the audience should feel her excitement, especially during the bridge. (I always get a kick out of that lyric about people who aren't afraid to have a feeling--we cold and analytical WASPs know nothing of such foolishness. Feelings are for hoi polloi.) I still have never seen an actress who did a great job with that song.

The direction was pretty good but I thought I recognized some of it. Jason confirmed after the performance that it was lifted bit for bit from the Broadway staging. One thing I thought they changed (for the better) was Evelyn Nesbit's number, "The Crime of the Century" which as I recall in the original had Evelyn in a swing above the stage. This makes Evelyn a much more static character--an observer rather than a participant. This production brought Evelyn down on the same level as the others--better, but I would still get her out of the swing some. She should work the swing, and the crowd--use the swing as a prop, as it were. It gets boring just seeing her swing through the entire number. The Evelyn was too young for this role and came off as rather too girlish and unfinished. She seemed to be posing, rather than embodying the character. However I was impressed with her gracefulness. Give her a few years.

Regarding the show itself--after seeing it a second time (my first was the tour in '98), I'm not sure Evelyn is really that necessary. I don't think she really serves much plot purpose other than spurning Mother's Younger Brother which starts his journey of Searching For a Cause. And I'm not sure what thematic importance she holds. The "Warn the Duke" bit needs to go as well; it's completely random.

Overall I was very impressed with the production--it was amazingly ambitious for community theater. However, I was outraged later to find that the cast was responsible for supplying their own costumes. That's just unconscionable. They're already supplying their talent for free. Apparently the suggestion was even made that they should rent their costumes. Unbelievable. That production charged a decent sum for tickets, plus it solicited donations and sold tons of ad space. Where'd all that money go? Why did they force the actors to ante up for their own costumes?