Do I wake or sleep?

Friday evening I went down to the Gene Frankel to see the last Planet Connections show I could, Doug's (our Tom in Sweeter Dreams) other show, Hummingbirds. Not bad at all--his performance was great, as were the two women. One of them (the two women) buttonholed me two weeks ago after Sweeter Dreams, raving about my performance and...touching me?! Not inappropriately but flirtatiously. I certainly wasn't offended but was wondering if I'd interpreted that correctly and later Duncan said "oh yeah, she was all over you." Okay, then! Anyway, she and the other woman, whom I'd seen in another PC show, Loose Women... (she was great) were both very strong. I couldn't hang out to compliment anyone afterwards, as I had to book way back uptown to catch the end of Jason's "Take Back the Park" viewing--I guess I'm sort of a mascot now!

I got there and it was a bit of a bust, due to the clouds. There were about 5 other men besides Jason--he introduced me and then he and I talked for a bit. After the interview came out the day before, Jason had emailed me, calling me "very brave" and he followed up on this. I demurred a bit--I'm not traumatized, and nothing lasting happened to me, other than radicalizing me even MORE about rape and violence against women. It's not brave, it's just facts. At any rate, he told me that he thinks the interview was not just on local radio, but on "All Things Considered"--which is national! Wow! He thinks this because some friends of his heard the interview in New jersey, out of range of local NYC radio stations. Pretty cool!

I got home and heard the AMAZING NEWS!!!! YAAAAAAAAYYYYY!!! So, so happy for all my gay friends and family--we truly are all brothers and sisters in the eyes of God! So happy that the New York legislators did the right thing. It is TIME! I started weeping, reading the explosion of joy of Facebook. Then the historian in me was even more moved reading what the legislators had said to explain their affirmative votes--this especially got to me:

Republican Senator Mark Grisanti then spoke about his struggle before coming to his decision to vote for the bill. "A man can be wiser today than he was yesterday," he said.

This is literally bringing tears to my eyes. This is how progress is made. This is how we make things better, not just for us but for those around us. This is the difficult, incremental process of social evolution. There has seemed to be so much anger and hatred for the past 20 years in politics--so many wedge issues, so much pointless divisiveness, so much cruelty. (Specifically, I'm thinking of shitty, godless Pat Robertson blaming 9-11 on feminism and homosexuality. That's not partisan, that's not ideological or true to your religious beliefs, that's just being a nasty, cruel piece of shit.) I'm not kidding myself that it's all ended--I know it hasn't. But by God, in the past 3 years, we've elected a black man to our highest office, and we've just doubled the number of gay people in this country who can be married. Even the setbacks are being nullified, like when Prop 8 was overturned in the courts. I love reading about the '60s--there was so much incredible heroism in the civil rights and anti-war movements, and so much history was made. It happened so quickly. My friends, these are our sixties. This is our time, our chance to change the world for the better. To grow, to accomplish--to change the world.

By the way, I just called my state senator and thanked him for voting yes on Friday. His assistant was thrilled, thanked me and told me also to email him, which I will.

Saturday was the final performance of Sweeter Dreams--Christine was there, as was my friend Linda, as well as Jason and Caroline. Jason was right up front laughing at everything, it was great. I had a little fun with the interview scene and finally FINALLY got a laugh on my throwaway snark on Joanna Remarque. I made two small adjustments--I emphasized my criticism of her in my first monologue just a little bit more, to set it up, and then in the interview I made the eye roll bigger and FINALLY got a laugh! I also added a new obnoxiously correct pronunciation--Spielberg is now Schpeelberg, the way the Germans would say it. Heather told me they all laughed backstage when they heard that.

After the show Jason and I got Mexican food and just had a nice long convo. I had plans to have dinner with Tim so I raced hom and got ready, then I met him at Houston's by the Lipstick Building (one of my favorite buildings in the city). We talked forevs, had a lovely time. He thinks the cop rape verdict is complete bullshit, BTW. We went to a bar for a nightcap and the Yankees game was on--they showed a guy sliding headfirst in slomo and I commented that I'd done hook slides (and of course regular slides) but I'd never slid head first, I was too nervous about messing up my face.

Sunday I slept quite late--finally got up and cleaned and got ready for my Sunday softball game. We played the Northwestern team and HAMMERED them. The final score was 12-1. Yikes! I hit .500, plus a sacrifice grounder. And I was part of a double-play--there was a runner at 2nd who was caught between the bases when our center fielder caught it. I yelled "Throw it here, he has to tag up!" And when I got the ball, ran his ass down, even though I could've just ran back to 2nd base. But what fun would that have been? :) It's more fun to tag them!

At one point I was on 1st base and someone popped it up to the infield--the 2nd and 1st base players weren't communicating too well, so I gambled, thinking they wouldn't catch it. Well, the 2nd basewoman DID catch it so I was in trouble since I hadn't tagged up! I DOVE back to 1st base just under the tag--so now I can say yes, I HAVE slid head first!

After the game 5 of us hung around for batting practice and then we went over to a bar when the Northwestern team told us they'd be. And--I think one of my teammates was flirting with me? Sometimes it's hard to tell. But he seems to direct a lot of attention my way--he's always teasing me or asking me questions, and then he was comparing our gloves (his is huge and expensive, mine is very old--I've had it since I was 8-9--and NOT-expensive) he said something like "I'll only buy her a good one if she goes on a date with me." Um, what?! I'm just saying, my female radar is pinging. He is cute, though. Anyway, we all had pitchers and maued wings. Nom, nom, nom...

So this weekend kind of wiped me out but in a good way.

Friday

Tim and I went to the Open--we had the same seats we have every year which are fantastic. In Arthur Ashe wwe're in one of the corners, a couple of rows behind the family/player guest box, so we have seen the Williams family many times. (As we did this year.) Our Louis Armstrong seats are even better--three rows from the court. Tim has a friend who has season tickets for these seats for every day of the Open and just gives them away.

I got there a little late, around 1:00 but quickly got caught up on the first big match, Novak Djokovic (no. 3 seed) against Radek Stepanek (I can't remember his ranking--somewhere in the 40s, I think?). Anyway, this was an amazing match. They were neck and neck in every single set--the first two, and the final set went to tie-breakers. Just a perfect match, full of terrific play from both sides. The coolest thing about the match was how word was spreading through the complex that this was THE match, and the crowds got bigger...and bigger...and bigger. Not just in the stadium but on the grounds as well--there were huge crowds gathering at the big outdoor screens.

We saw Serena Williams who was struggling against some Russian player--it'll be interesting to watch her match against Justine. And Venus who looked lyrical out there--she was playing flawlessly, just eating up the court with those long legs of hers. She was in very good shape too, much better than Serena. If Serena and Venus continue to win, I think they're scheduled to meet in the semis--and I think Venus will take it. I think she may be going all the way.

We saw Rafael Nadal (who is HOT, just wook at dat cute little Mouseketeer face) play some interesting tennis--he's so good but he's suffering from tendonitis, as was his opponent, who retired sometime in the second set. So I rushed back over to Louis Armstrong to watch Lleyton Hewitt (also HOT) get smoked by Agustin Calleri, who sadly got knocked out two days later. Calleri was playing some incredible tennis that day, though--he's on his way for some big things.

At one point during the Djokovic/Stepanek match, I saw in the program that Martina Hingis and Daniela Hantuchova were playing a doubles match on Court 8 and I snaked my way through the general seating crowd to try to catch some of that. Sadly I got there just at the end and only got a glimpse of Martina. Love her tennis.

After a day full of glorious, wonderful, 5-set tennis ( we were especially thrilled because last year, the evening session was rained out), Tim and I finally left around 11:30 and went to the Wicked Wolf to get something to eat and hang out with his friend Donovan. I got home around 2:00.

Saturday

I had a riding lesson at 2:30 which meant I had to be out the door by 12:30 or so--unfortunately I was so tired from the Open, I forgot to set my alarm and woke up at 12:17. I was rushing around so much, I left my apartment in a mess which I HATE. But I quite enjoyed my lesson--they gave me a slightly smaller horse, Invisible, who was a former racehorse. One of the weirdest trots I've ever encountered--it was extremely bouncy and unrhythmic. I had to sit the trot for awhile before I could figure out how to post. I had one exciting event happen when Invisible spooked and TOOK OFF. Not a canter, a flat out gallop across the ring. I was thinking "okay, I may get thrown here, just stay relaxed" and all the time gathering up the reins in my hands, rolling them over my hands. Finally he stopped. The instructor, Helen, said "yes, you need to keep shorter reins with him, he likes to go. But the good thing is, you kept your seat and you stopped him. Were you scared?" I said a little, but I figured I'd get him under control.

After the lesson, I met Duncan at Elana's for a quick stopover at her Labor Day weekend house party--we had hamburgers and yummy food, and Lorraine's savage doggie attacked me with doggie kisses. I barely survived. Doggie kisses are intense. Elana let me shower at her place, and I was able to freshen up.

Duncan and I left after about an hour to go over to Queens for the Foxy Brown reading. I was so tired, I dozed off during our ten-minute break--I could hardly keep my eyes open. I went home and cuh-rashed.

My air conditioner is not working very well so Tim's taking it to a repair place sometime today. I slept on the floor last night rather than in the loft because it gets too hot up there. Like Duncan I am also a product of steamy summers in the South and I love this weather. I don't even mind the slight drizzle today as long as it stays warm. I love the sensuality of humidity, the feeling of warm damp air against your skin.

It's interesting sleeping on the floor. I put down as many blankets as I could on the carpet but I was still a tiny bit stiff when I woke up this morning. (But rested nonetheless, since I wasn't tossing and turning due to heat.) It feels sort of like a slumber party. I'm a little worried about Krista visiting next week since I don't know if the AC will be fixed by then. I suppose we could both sleep on the floor--she could be by the window and I'd be down the "hallway." I don't think she'd fit. I just don't want her to be uncomfortable.

I took Friday off (day only) to sleep in, because I knew I wouldn't get much sleep over the weekend. (Saturday and Sunday were the two days of the Motorcycle Safety Foundation class.) I slept until 12:30 and then just streeeeeetched in bed. It felt great. I've figured out a new way to angle my body in the loft so that I get a little more room, and for those of you who've seen how small my apartment is, you know how precious extra space is. Eventually I thundered downstairs and showered and got all dolled up, and then left for work (evening shift), stopping at a new restaurant to get a grilled Jack and avocado on sourdough sandwich. Yumm. Sat at the phones from 5-8 and then went down the the Village, to a cute place called the Fat Black Pussycat, where I met with Janna and a bunch of her friends to celebrate her birthday. They had a specialty drink called a Key Lime Margarita that was damn good. We ended up leaving and going over to someone's apartment and hanging out for awhile. I eventually left around 12:30 am and walked home.

Which I regretted the next morning, at 5:15, when I woke up. I had to be at the Yonkers Raceway at 7:30 sharp and was--tremble--relying upon public transportation to do so. The school said to leave at least 45 minutes to get there, so I left my apartment at 6:00, all bundled up in my ankle-covering boots, my jeans, my long-sleeved shirt and my gloves and went to the subway station at 50th & 8th. And waited. And waited. And waited some more. I grabbed the first train that came along after 15 minutes and then, after it took off, I realized it was a local A train, rather than the E train I needed. At 59th St. I got off, ran to a taxi and went to 59th & Lexington. After another interminable wait the 4 finally arrived, and I rode it all the way to the end. I was supposed to catch a Bee Line bus, or whatever they're called but eventually grabbed a gypsy cab and got there just in time.

The class had 36 people in it, mostly men (only 4 women). They plowed right on through the booklet, quizzing us after every chapter, and then showing us videos to reinforce what we'd learned. Blah blah blah--written test and I got a 100%. We went out to the range around 1:00 and got on our bikes. It was drizzling at that point but gradually started coming down harder. And harder. And harder. They gave me extra rain gear but I still was soaked. And cold. They decided to let us go early because it was so disgusting--my waterproof raincoat was soaked. Ick. A guy in the class drove me back to the Upper West Side and I took a taxi back to my place. Tim was at Belmont with some great seats and wanted me to join him but I couldn't even think about getting on another train and going out to LI.

While I was in the taxi, Bart called me to say he and Lisa were planning to see a 5:15 showing of Down With Love and did I want to come? Exhausted as I was, I did because I don't get to see Bart that often. I changed and schlepped over in rain gear to the Loew's where I slept through a decent portion of the movie. Jesus, I couldn't keep my eyes open to save my life. If there'd been a fire I would've been in serious trouble. What I remember of the movie, I enjoyed--it was designed to a fare-thee-well, and I love movies and plays like that. Afterward Bart, Lisa and I went to Chevy's Mexican and then I went home.

Sunday night Tim and I attended the 11th Annual "Broadway Sings," a benefit run by his friend Tim Shew, who's performed as Valjean, the Radio City Christmas Show Santa, and a bunch of other roles. The benefit supports children with AIDS and hosts many different Broadway performers who each sing a song. This year it included Cady Hoffman, Jose Illana (the juvenile in Flower Drum Song), Patricia Neal (who introduced a guest--she didn't sing) and many others. Getting seated was interesting--you get tickets to be seated in a row, but not any particular seat within the row since they're church pews (it was at Central Presbyterian on Park Avenue). We got there early because Tim wanted to sit as close as possible to the center. After waiting for 45 minutes (I was in high heels on a marble floor--not exactly comfortable) we got to the row and found this woman and her daughter claiming 5 of the inside seats, even though only two of her party were there. We let her have a couple of seats but not all she wanted and she retaliated by sending the usher over to try to get us to move down (i.e., farther away from the center). The usher was clearly uncomfortable (she weakly said, "Well, she wants her party to sit together") but we refused to move.

Can I just say I hate that shit? That drives me nuts at the movies when some jerkoff drapes their coat over ten seats and says they're taken. No, they're not. How do I know this? Because nobody's sitting there. Let your friends get here early if they want to sit in better seats. What really pissed me off was that we let her have a couple of seats as it was and she had to be greedygrabbygrubby and demand more.

So the show. Pretty good. Not sublime and a little too masturbatory with some of the performers. Cady was great--she sang "Bewitched, Bothered and Bewildered" and was just so...precise. She nailed it. Susan Powell (Miss America 1981) sang "An Old-Fashioned Wedding" with some guy. She has a beautiful voice although not at all the typical pop-y Broadway style in vogue now. Another woman sang "The Life of the Party" from the Andrew Lippa The Wild Party and was also very good. I talked to her afterwards and said how much I appreciated her connection with the audience--she really seemed to be having a dialogue with us. She thanked me and said "that means a lot to me." I notice that more and more with stage performances, whether the singer is too into themselves or is communing with the audience.

I had a delightful conversation with Jose Illana. I told him how I'd seen FDS the night before it closed and told him how I especially enjoyed the last part where one by one the cast members revealed where they were born. I loved this moment in the play--it made the whole show seem so organic. You realized how much this story meant to these performers. He said "Yes! I'm so glad you got it!" Apparently the backers were dubious about that bit. We chatted some more and it turns out he's from my neck of the woods, Springfield, Virginia. We both flipped out when we realized this, and I told him I'd performed (i.e., served time) in many shows at the Lazy Susan. Just a really cool guy. It was great talking to him.

Tim's old partner, this guy named Rodney, cornered me and sang Tim's praises for quite some time. It made me a tad uncomfortable, because I don't exactly know what Tim's said to this guy. Rodney was all, "Tim's the greatest, if you're looking for this, for that, he's a straight-up guy, blah blah blah..." I don't know if I'm looking for anything. I'm pretty happy with the way things are.

Saw Fool for Love last night. Interesting. Everyone was good except the actress playing May who was too young and just too...inexperienced to play that role. May is used. She's been rode hard and put up wet. The actress was acting-by-numbers--"okay, here's where I act angry and push him away, here's where I cry 'Eddie!', here's where I kiss him." Not only was she not in the moment, her "moods" were too clearly defined--and with May, even more so than with most people, her emotions are always mixed, because of the nature of their relationship with Eddie. There are no clear boundaries. And she rushed unbearably through her big monologues--there was no sense of rediscovery, reliving. Furthermore her speech was much too precise for the role. Ick. Whatever made her think she'd be good in that role (she apparently cast herself)? She was completely inadequate. It was hard to watch. Tim asked me how I thought I'd do in the role--I said I though I'd do better than her, but I don't know how good I'd be in the role. May is such a different character from me. OTOH, I love roles that...wallow. I like exploring the dark side.

I cannot believe how exhausted I am. The hell? I slept pretty badly this weekend--I went to bed after 3:00 am both nights and the apartment is sooooo warm. But still. I'm still going to try to work out tonight but I have to take home my new! convector! oven! first. It arrived today at work and now I'm just quivering with excitement. Especially because last night I tried to make some chocolate-peanut butter chip bars and simply could not get them to bake all the way through, thanks to my old, piece-of-crap toaster oven.

Anyway--the weekend:

( Friday Evening )

( Saturday Afternoon )

( Saturday Night )

( Sunday )

Tired. Dik and Jayne last performance tonight. Tim, Ryan and someone I know from a class I took two years ago, James, are all coming. Don't know about anyone else.

Looking forward to sleeping in tomorrow morning.