Do I wake or sleep?

 I directed a play for Elizabeth (a lil' 10-minute thing) and it went up today.  The venue was quite nice, in a library not too far from my place.  Vaulted ceilings and decent acoustics (for singing).

I've been thinking for a while now--I really want to get back into performing, especially voice.  I did two concerts for Donna last year and I'm wondering how I can expand on that.  Maybe do a concert at this venue (I chatted up the guy who was running things).  And I'd like--maybe, if I have the time--to start up Holla Holla again this summer, in a limited way, a reading of some kind (Shakespeare, of course) of the neighborhood.  My place is big enough, we could have rehearsals here.

I really love to be on stage.  I love to sing and I love to act.  And I need to get back to that.  It's part of what makes me me.

So I'm in Duncan's play, Sweeter Dreams, playing Roberta leFay, the film critic. We started off-book rehearsals last week which terrified me going in--Roberta has a CRAZY-long monologue that kicks off the play, 2+ pages. As well as 4 or so other monologues ranging from 1.5 pages to a paragraph. I have two scenes with dialogue but most of my performance is me monologuing. As I worked on it I realized the sound of the voice I'm giving her reminded me of Darren Nichols from Slings and Arrows--appropriate since the two characters share certain elemental personality traits. I built on that and now she definitely has her own distinct, weird voice, especially with the Rs. "That's grrret!"

I got through the first off-book rehearsal okay--not great but okay. I was terrified for the first, longest monologue--I literally sat there in one pose for pretty much the entire piece, just thinking ahead to the next phrase, the next thought. Every time I run them, my muscle memory retains a little bit more. That said, I kind of like Roberta being a little stiff in weird ways. You'll see what I mean when you come to the show, but I have this kind of Juliet Prowse on the bottom, Dawn Weiner on the top body language thing going on. Anyway every rehearsal is a little easier, even though I keep changing the pronunciations of certain words. Based on my analysis of the text, I decided that Roberta was very Baroque, and likes to complicate things. She also likes words, as evidenced by her LONG monologues and by her florid vocabulary, and likes to be very correct in her pronunciations of foreign phrases. So I add syllables, I enunciate words within an inch of their lives, I over-hit my Ds & Ts. It's fun. I've been cracking up Duncan and the cast which of course is great--I'm doing my job--but then *I* laugh as well. I'll be fine in performance, it's just in rehearsal I lose it. I've never played a character as over-the-top as this.

We had our dress rehearsal last night--I have INSANE amounts of costumes. All huge-ass power suits and dresses. My first outfit is basically a whole effing COW--heavy red leather top, heavy leather skirt. My heart sank when I looked at all the outfits lined up--it just seems like so much, so much clothes, so many scenes, SO MUCH VERBIAGE. But actually the runthrough went quite well--I'm on the other side, I'm not that nervous about performances anymore. And I made some of the cast members laugh during my interview of Brad. Yay for being funny!

Last night the current President of Sweet Briar appeared at a cocktail party hosted by an alum in her Park Avenue apartment. All NYC-area alums were invited so I showed up to schmooze a bit--Christian told me that the SBC President is really into theater, and I figured it wouldn't hurt to meet her and make a good impression, all for Project Thyme. Nice party--LOTS of smoked salmon and other nibblies, and everyone was very friendly. (Sooooo nice to hear some Southern accents.) Schmoozing accomplished.

Lots of theater coming up--Anya and I are going to see the campus production of The Wedding Singer tomorrow night--I want to meet with some of them if I can and possibly find out how to put in a bid to direct. Can't hurt to build up some on-campus credits. And then Ashley is performing in The HMS Pinafore the next two weeks, so I have to catch that as well. Also Michael Clay (Marley in Xmas Carol '07, Friar Lawrence in Romeo and Juliet, Scrooge in Xmas Carol '09) is doing Twelfth Night (LOVE that poster!) in Midtown--haven't seen that in a while, must see! Here's the thing, though--I get a little antsy at having to see Ashley in Pinafore because it's not a cheap ticket--the least expensive is $25--and Ashley's only in the chorus. If she were Josephine of course I'd love to see it--but spending that much money to see her in chorus? Argh. I'm so poor right now. But I want to support Ashley and I know she loves working with this group. Here's hoping this production isn't focused on the music at the expense of the comedy. I just wish I could get a student rate--they nail you bigtime for service fees, $4 no matter what (phone, credit card, mail) if you buy it in advance.

Oh, and I saw Sleep No More Tuesday night. Very interesting--it's kind of a haunted house/theme park version of Mackers (i.e., immersive, environmental, non-linear) if Stanley Kubrick had directed it. I kept thinking of two Kubrick pieces in particular--The Shining and Eyes Wide Shut. It's interesting but it's a LOT of money for kind of an incomplete experience. But I did like it very much.

Softball tomorrow--first game of the season! Can't wait!

Yesterday Anya and I made pumpkin pie ice cream--we have TONS left over, if anyone wants some please feel free to stop by and take some home. I made it with the old-fashioned recipe which uses eggs so it's really, really rich--we both could barely finish our bowls. As much as I love summer, I love autumn, and after the heat this summer, I am very much looking forward to a productive season. And on that note--

Today I start classes--yay!, can't wait to buckle down and get all academic and immerse myself in times and cultures past. I love school so much. All of you can expect to be treated to breathless updates of Eloise and Abelard's scandalous forbidden romance.

Tonight Dave and I have a meeting about Pirates. And hey! No one commented on that last week, by the way--

Attention! I'm directing The Pirates of Penzance for TTC's inaugural season at Monroe in Hoboken!

Maybe that'll get your attention ;) Anyway, am thrilled and going over the libretto now trying to figure out what I want to do with it. I have some ideas--I'm going to try to give it a slightly more updated, streamlined sensibility without it devolving into the mess that was The Pirate Movie. (I will restrain myself mightily and NOT include "Pumpin' and Blowin'." Although it IS tempting.) Fewer ruffles, more simple hotness, a more knowing quality without its being too campy or winky. More musical theater, less operetta. I just better have some decent actors coming out--you always get amazing vocal talent coming out for Pirates but as someone who's seen and done the show numerous times, I can attest you don't always get decent actors.

I'll post about the US Open later but it was fantastic as always.

As Duncan mentioned, my alma mater Sweet Briar asked us to host a chat with current arts students. The students are all on Spring Break this week, and the woman in charge of this, Christian Carr, organized an arts-oriented trip to NYC for the week, for credit. They visited museums, saw shows, etc. Originally they were going to come to a Timon rehearsal but we had to change those plans when Timon was pushed back to the fall.

They're staying at the Gershwin Hotel--I've seen pictures of this place before but never visited there. It's gorgeous, very visually striking. We sat in the lobby and were served cheesecake and champagne, and talked to them about what producing actually entailed, the difference between producing outdoors and indoors, what difficulties came with the job, how my experience as a director/producer informed my acting, various playwriting questions for Duncan, all sorts of things. Most of the questions were more interesting and thoughtful than I expected--for example, I usually get asked how being an actor informs my experience as director, not the other way around. And Theatrical Girl asked me "if you had an unlimited budget, which two Shakespeare plays would you most like to do?" I thought about it and said "probably either The Tempest or the Scottish Play. You need something magical for Tempest, some kind of lovely special effects--you don't have to have them, but that's how I'd like it, it's a very spectacular show." And with the Scottish play--I said there are a lot of bad productions out there because 1) its nihilist message is difficult really to comprehend, it's an extremely dark play, and 2) everyone loves it so it gets done a lot. Hence, badly. But anyway, you need atmosphere to help with that nihilism. You need to do it in an enclosed space and take the audience on that journey.

I was talking to them about how Shakespeare straddled the medieval and Renaissance worlds like a Colossus--some of his themes emphasize the importance of social structure and how things go wrong when you challenge that (an essentially medieval value). But he was also the first humanist, the first writer to capture so much of humanity, of personality, in his writing. Every one of us knows someone like Mercutio, the too-smart-for-his-own-good mouthy teenager, or Othello, driven mad by jealousy. Everyone of us can identify to some extent with Macbeth, who starts the play as a good man and who is corrupted by his own ambition. Duncan and I also talked about The Thyme of the Season. Here's a thought, Duncan--maybe we could take that production down to SBC and perform it there. They do book-ins all the time at Babcock.

It was really a lot of fun. They were seated all around us, and at first they were a little shy--one girl, who had the most theatrical experience (albeit mostly technical), asked a lot of questions and then eventually the others started raising their hands as well. We talked for quite a while. Somebody said something about visiting campus and giving a talk there and I said that I'd thought about suggesting one, but wasn't sure if they'd want that. Theatrical Girl assured me, oh yes! They'd love it. The head of the department, Bill Kershner, had just started there when I was a junior--in fact he cast me as the Emcee in Cabaret. It'd be wild to go back with him still there! After the talk Christian was talking to us--Duncan and me--about both going down. Hey, as long as they're willing to pick up the tab for travel expenses (and of course they'd have to put us up but that's no biggie, they have an inn right on campus), I would LOVE to go back. I was talking it up to Duncan, saying what we could do, and I said "and we could hack! You ride, right? Bring your boots and your hardhat and we could go out for a hack!"

On another note--this is a tiny annoyance, but it is one nonetheless. When I sent out the Mardi Gras invitation, one person emailed me that she couldn't go but could she send me a check for Tipitina's? I said sure, thank you, gave her my address. After the party, I sent out a "thank you, we raised $X" message and she replied with another request for my address and a promise to contribute. Again, I gave her my address. Two weeks go by, still haven't heard. I email her again, asking if she'd gotten the emails since she hadn't responded either time (i.e., with a quick "got it, will send it out soon"). She said she was sorry, "life got in the way," but she'd send me a check. Two weeks later--still nothing. I give up. I'm sending the money in to Tipitina's.

So I saw Twelfth Night at the Delacorte last night. I'd been planning to go with Griffin (my plan being to try to get tickets during previews, especially with what I expect will be a hot ticket like this one) but he forgot and had to work on Wednesday so I texted Lori to see if she wanted the other ticket. Yesterday was drizzling and quite grim in the morning and I almost decided not to go wait on line, but I figured I was up, I might as well. Waited on line for 3 and a half hours--I had to spread out my umbrella on the wet ground since I'd forgotten to bring a chair or blanket or something.

I'd brought a book, Connie Willis's Doomsday Book (which I'm rereading) and mostly passed time that way and checking Facebook. The Public is obviously trying to improve the line experience--they have a new food concessionaire which is also open during the day, so you can just walk up there to get something to eat. (It used to be that you could only get food by ordering from the cafes and delis near the theater.) The new concessionaire is MUCH better than the one they used to have, which was mostly ice cream novelties, brownies/cookies and sodas. This new one has really good coffee (Illy coffee, which is excellent), wine and beer, sandwiches, breakfast foods, salads, etc. For breakfast I decided to get coffee, a whoopie pie (what?), and "Market berries with sour cream and brown sugar." YUM. Not only is the food good, but you don't even have to walk up to the window--if you're willing to wait, eventually someone will come around and take your order while you're on line. And they even take credit cards! How awesome is that?!

So I scored my two tickets and danced away. I just love free summer theater, it's one of those things that makes city life so great. Lori met me after work and we went over together, getting a yummy little meal, including two glasses of prosecco, which we were allowed to eat at our seats.

This production of Twelfth Night looks as though it's going to be quite good--it was the first preview so it's settling into place still. Most of the principals are quite strong, with Hamish Linklater stealing the show completely as Sir Andrew. He is HILARIOUS, every time he opens his mouth people were dying of laughter. Anne Hathaway is good, but not yet great as Viola, but the basic work is there, she just needs to settle into the role. I do think she and Audra (also very good) missed some of the poignancy and sweet epiphanies of their first scene together ("The honorable lady of the house, which is she?")--the willow cabin speech was just sort of barreled through, and I didn't see much vulnerability there, nor did I see much of a transformation in Olivia during the scene, from cold-hearted lady of the house to a woman infatuated. However, again, I think they just need time.

Getting back to Viola, Anne is playing her as a much more believable male than I did (which is of course fine). She actually could pass as a guy. My thinking was that I'm kind of thrown into trying to pass as a male, and there's a learning curve. (At one point during rehearsals, Ben gave me the note that when I first run over to Orsino on "On your attendance, my lord; here," that I was running "like a girl." I gave him a LOOK and he laughed and said "I know you can kick my ass" and I replied "That's a choice! Believe me, I do NOT run like that normally!") I don't know that there's a need for Viola to be completely believable as a guy, because I think most people will believe what they're told until there's a very good reason to believe otherwise. And let's face it, Orsino is pretty oblivious. I also played Viola as much more--consciously light-hearted, as in I'm trying NOT to think about Sebastian and this grief that surrounds me, and as a result of this tension things strike me as much funnier. This came out the most in II, iv--I always loved that exchange between her and Orsino when she says "About your years, my lord" and "Of your complexion, my lord." I played it like I was about to burst out laughing--the lines are genuinely, of themselves, hilarious, and it's also my own private joke. Then the song "Come Away, Death" (in which they had first Orsino and then Viola join in--it was quite beautiful), and my mood changes completely, leading to the intense colloquy between O & V, culminating with

...she pined in thought,
And with a green and yellow melancholy
She sat like patience on a monument,
Smiling at grief. Was not this love indeed?

I didn't really see that intense undertone of I'm desperately hoping you will actually get what I'm really saying, and yet I'm afraid to disturb this delicate balance. It was played more for laughs than anything, and there's so much to mine there. And I think you do need to have that mood change in that scene--V & O actually have relatively little stage time together, so you have to compress their relationship. So something has to happen, has to change in that scene.

I was a little disappointed with her rapport with Orsino, I don't know that I really saw that intense bond they have, the bond that makes II, iv, that big scene, throb with subtext, the bond that explodes into violence in the last scene. I thought Esparza was quite good as Orsino, I just didn't quite see that chemistry between them; in fact, after Sebastian and Viola meet in the last scene, they go off and hang out together, instead of her going right back to Orsino, like "see, everything is explained--now will you let me off the hook?" (Because even after Sebastian is revealed, she still doesn't know that Orsino loves her.) However, this was a much more overtly comic Twelfth Night. I said to Lori--they've almost staged it as a fable, "once upon a time, in a land far away..." The whole feeling is pastoral and lyrical--the set is a bunch of grassy, green, waving hills that the characters slide down and dance across, and the Celtic, lilting music is very effectively and beautifully deployed (Anne sings several times, and sounds quite lovely). The whole feeling sort of distances you from the more adult, autumnal nuances of the text. This is of course completely appropriate, but I do love those nuances--I love the haunting qualities of this play, the undertone of melancholy and a pure love that is completely suppressed, and the mourning for a dead twin with that background of water, water. If you develop those qualities, it makes the ending truly joyous, rather than just a resolution.

I was disappointed in the Maria, I just don't think she brought much to the role. Toby was decent but not great. Again, I prefer a slightly more menacing Toby. Malvolio was also good but not great, IMO--frankly, I thought Tom was funnier. Frankly, though, I'm usually not that interested in the TN subplot--I'm always sort of twitching impatiently until we get back to Viola and Orsino and Olivia. But as I said, Sir Andrew was HI-LARIOUS. And I did like the Sebastian (he was dreaaaamy). I thought the fighting looked pretty good, but Lori (who trained at LAMDA) was more critical.

So, the Tony noms were announced yesterday. So, SO thrilled about Shrek's 8 noms--they deserve every one. I saw the show again Sunday night, courtesy of Michael--my third time, this is the first Broadway show I've ever seen three times (and I finally got to see Leah Greenhaus in it!). Still hilarious, and I love the score. My favorite songs are "Story of My Life," "I Know It's Today," "Travel Song," "This is How a Dream Comes True," "Morning Person," "I Think I Got You Beat," "When Words Fail" and of course "Freak Flag." (I always want to start bopping around in the aisle during that song.) "I'm wood/I'm good/Get used to it!" John Tartaglia KILLS me as Pinocchio, with his gay Southern accent.

Anf the most exciting aspect of all the nominations? RYAN, my little Ryan, will be performing at the TONYS!!!!

I met Ryan backstage after the show. As I came inside the stage door, Leah Greenhaus was walking down the stairs and we chatted. I reminded her that we'd met at DeBaun about a year ago--she had that polite child actor smile, I don't think she quite remembered me but had perfect manners nonetheless! She reminds me so much of Mia at that age, so cute. I waited for Ryan for quite a lng time waiting in the wing--I saw Christopher Sieber go by and wanted to yelp "OMG, you're so hilarious!" but didn't quite dare. But he really IS awesome as Farquaad. Who knew the straight-man father on the Olsen Twins vehicle Two of a Kind would be such a success on Broadway?

I like this analysis (from ATC) about why Tony in West Side Story never seems to get a nomination:

( That's because Tony is a hard-ass role to cast. )

This is so true! It's truly a thankless role. But I did like Matt Cavenaugh in it--I liked how he made it his own, both the book scenes and the phrasing (I didn't mind his back-phrasing but I do that as well). And he reads as straight up there. I think he's a *little* old for the role but *shrug.*

Nice to see that reasons to be pretty got some major noms--I hope it'll help their bottom line. And I'm guessing part of Raul's nom was for his challenge of maintaining the role against three different actors playing opposite him. I only wish they could've found a way to nominate William H. Macy just to screw it to Jeremy Piven. He got off scot-free for his unprofessional shenanigans.

I'm kind of hoping that the three Billys win. It's a weird way to nominate (these things only seem to happen in theater--Alice Ripley/Emily Skinner, the kids in the original Sound of Music all sharing a nom for Best Featured Actress (!--there were two boys in the family!), etc.). Billy is just such a difficult role, I'd really like to see them get something besides a nomination.

I'm gonna die if I can't get to see Hair soon.

Needing cawfee this morning. Exhausted from my schedule this week.

I saw Billy Elliot last night. The score is a little weak--some numbers are really bland, like the opening one (so bland I can't tell you the name or what it's really about) but I loved the final miners' song, the hymn-like number "Once We Were Kings." It's quite haunting, the way they stage it and how the number develops. I also liked the folk song the father sings at the top of the second act. I may even get this recording (not a huge fan of Elton John's scores, generally).

The kid who played Billy (David Alvarez last night) was really, really good. I find it incredible that a young kid can be that talented--he does ballet, taps, gymnastics, is a credible, touching actor, and even nails the accent. And somehow they've found three of these kids, and more including the London cast. The kid who plays Billy's friend Michael was also great--what a little scene-stealer! Absolutely infectious energy, and extremely believable in his scenes, especially his second act scene with Billy. I also loved the little ballet girls (and how sweet is it that Michael listed every one of the girls in his review! I bet they were thrilled to see their names mentioned).

Michael asked me last night what I thought about one of the staging bits, a number where Billy dances with his future self and at one point the younger Billy is hooked to a harness to fly around literally. Michael thought it was too gimmicky--I liked it but couldn't explain why, other than to say I liked the metaphor. Later I realized why--it makes me think of why I enjoy hacking on a horse--because that's the closest I can get to flying. When I'm on a horse by myself, cantering or galloping across a field, taking a fence--it feels like flying and that's why it's fun.

I also really enjoyed the very grounded, realistic backdrop (the miners' strike in Northern England in '84-'85) of Billy's story. There's an incredible number in the middle of the first act where Billy's progression as a dancer is juxtaposed with the increasingly brutal tactics the police are using to confront the striking miners. It's a dazzling number, very cleverly staged--a theatrically staged number.

Aw. DeBaun cancelled tonight's A Christmas Carol. But the snow looks beautiful!

So, Michael and I saw Shrek last night. I thought it was great! A very tight, colorful (LOVED the scenes with all the fairy tale characters in them--just dazzling), funny show. I thought especial standouts were the Donkey and Lord Faquaad--he KILLED me. (And he's hot too...) But everyone was great. My favorite numbers were "I Got You Beat," the number that the exiled fairy tale characters sang when they first arrived at the swamp, and the number about "Let Your Freak Flag Fly." "I'm wood/It's good/Get used to it!"

I was so, so thrilled to see Ryan--my Ryan, my little brother, roommate, castmate, dear friend and partner in crime for the past 18 years--up there on stage living our dream! It was unbelievable, just incredible. My Ryan, my Henry. Oh, I'm all verklempt. I screamed his name during the curtain call (we were sitting pretty close, I2 & 4 right on the aisle). Michael and I went around to the stage door where I called Ryan who texted and called me back to come in but for some reason my phone didn't ring. Annoying. Anyway he came out and greeted us--we chatted for a bit, then he said he and a couple of his castmates, and one of their husbands, would be going out to a wine bar in Hell's Kitchen. I decided to join them and Michael recused himself as a reviewer. We went to the wine bar and the husband joined us--it was Hunter Foster. I had drinks last night with Hunter Foster! God, I love New York!

The wine bar was this adorable new place on 51st St. called Xai Xai. It's beautiful, decorated in a South African theme--I loved it, so atmospheric. Ryan and I ordered a chocolate fondue dish with sparkling wine "shooters," served in the thinnest, smallest flutes I've ever seen! Naturally that wasn't enough for me so I ordered a glass of pink champagne. We kept grabbing each other's hands and squealing. I just can't believe he's on Broadway! We were joking about the first show we did together, Oklahoma! at the Lazy Susan, and how when he'd been cast, he called his mother from the payphone in the lobby and said "I, uh, won't be studying in the dorms as much this semester...you'll be able to find me at...the Lazy Susan!" It was so adorably dorky (the Susan was a dump but he didn't know that, he was still innocent!) and I love to tease him about it. His castmates were very nice--for the most part they talked among themselves but every now and then they'd turn to me and ask me something, or direct a remark to us. I can get very shy with people I don't know sometimes especially when they're, you know, BROADWAY STARS, so I appreciated their initiating conversation.