Do I wake or sleep?

Thanksgiving went super well--the bus ride there wasn't bad at all, even with the storm. It rained but didn't delay us at all--I actually was able to catch an *earlier* connecting bus. Plus my step-mother's brother was supposed to join us with his daughters and they couldn't make it, due to the storm. I'm sorry to say that I silently yippeed. The uncle is kind of annoying--one of those guys who never reached his potential and is full of "if I'd stayed in college, I would've been a Rhodes Scholar" types. I remember calling Dad's place when I was in college and they weren't there but the uncle was and he was just SO TIRESOME. He wouldn't say whether they were there or not, kept playing these dumb games like "why do you want them?" and "what do you mean by that?" Plus he ran my Dad's restaurant into the ground. It's possible he's grown up since then but frankly I didn't want to risk my warm family Thanksgiving finding out!

So anyway it was just me and the parents--much as I missed my brothers, as anyone from a large family will tell you, one-on-one time with the parents is precious! Very nice and cozy. The parents live in an old farmhouse in rural New Hampshire--the house backs up to a forest and there's a little pond right on the property. They've done a ton of remodeling on it, including adding solar panels so now the whole homestead is powered with solar energy and heated with the numerous woodburning stoves we have. I was warm enough in my little room although I had a hard time sleeping. I went jogging three times--it's like something out of a Hallmark Christmas movie, or Currier and Ives, along that road. Highland Lake on one side of the road, sweeping fields with bundles of hay back up to the forest on the other, dotted with these old New Hampshire farmhouses. Very, very pretty. I just love it there and probably should visit a lot more! It's just such a pain to get to without a car...

One thing that made it so nice was that Daddy didn't go off about political matters. I am by far the furthest left in our little nuclear unit--my brothers are moderate to conservative, Liz is kind of a grab bag, and Dad is to the right of Attila the Hun (except that he's pro-choice and pro-gay rights. But RABIDLY anti-Obama, very pro-guns, etc.). I was kind of dreading any political talk--but Dad was great, only made one anti-Obama remark in passing. I should give him more credit, he definitely does not try to shove his views down our throats. (He's always held his tongue about the rift he and his brothers have with their sisters--he has talked about it very little and certainly hasn't tried to sway US (his children) against his sisters.)

So earlier this week I had--hold on to your seats here, kids, shocking news--MORE effing tooth trouble. I noticed Tuesday night that the crown toward the front of my mouth (in other words, this tooth, and this one--the same tooth that was crapped up by my crappy, expensive, ripoff former dentist) was loose. I PANICKED--I literally went cold at my computer. Called my dentist by it was after hours and they didn't have voicemail so I emailed them, begging for any time they could take me the next day. Was really, really freaked out Tuesday evening--I was just DREADING what might happen. Another dental operation that would cost me a ton of money, after how hard I've been trying to *save* money the past few months. Then I forced myself to calm down and think rationally. You don't KNOW that will happen, and maybe it'll just be a little thing that needs correction. I was talking to God about it, actually--I was able to calm down a bit although was still super stressed Tuesday night. I was also annoyed because I wanted to go to mass the next day (there's an Episcopal church some 20 blocks away on 5th Avenue, Church of the Heavenly Rest, that I've started attending--I really like them).

The dentist's office called me promptly at 9 the next morning and told me they could fit me in at 11. Dr. Kim looked at it and it *was* just a little thing--the glue had dissolved or something, so he just pulled it out, cleaned it up and reglued it. I was literally shaking during this and he told me "don't worry, it all looks as good as it could, it's not a big deal." The best part? This cost less than $5!!! When the receptionist told me that, I said deadpan "that's outrageous, I won't pay it." And pretty much danced out of there. And made it to church! My new dentist is the BEST and I am totally going to go onto Yelp and talk him up. I used to be so terrified of the dentist--and not because I was afraid of the pain, but the MONEY. My old dentists sucked and used me as an ATM--the worst was that they KNEW how worried I was about the money. That fucking hygienist, pushing those stupid EXPENSIVE ($100/pop) Arestin shots on me--you're a fucking HYGIENIST, why are you pushing an anti-biotic onto me (the weird thing about it was she'd say "it's up to you" and I'd flatly tell her I couldn't afford it, she would REALLY lean on me and double-down the pressure), you're not a doctor! While I'm on Yelp promoting Dr. Kim, I should put a few words in about the Levingarts (old dentist). Anyway, all is well now. Smile is preserved, as well as bank account :)

I'm having one of my days-long headaches, kept at bay by abusing my economy-sized bottle of Advil. God bless drugs. These headaches aren't the really bad ones I get sometimes* they just LAST. I chug ibuprofen, they go away for a few hours, then they're right back. I also massage the back of my head and around my ears a lot, which helps a little.

*About once or so every 3 years I will get absolutely TERRIBLE headaches, as bad as migraines, the kind where I literally cannot move or get up the pain is so bad. They last about 20 minutes and then taper off after that (so, not true migraines).

I'm spending Thanksgiving with Lori and Kevin down in Tom's River--can't wait for a nice long day of fattening food and good friends. I baked two pies for the occasion:



Pumpkin



Pecan

I bake everything from scratch, including pureeing the pumpkin and making my own crust. Last night I wrote this on FB and my friend Beth Diamond wrote that she was afraid to make a pie crust. Then my friend Debbie Heartley asked for the recipe, so I posted it. Three simple ingredients--flour, salt and oil. And it makes all the difference--nothing like making it ALL from scratch!

My Mom always calls cooking a creative art and I certainly think so--one reason I love pies is because you can mix it up so, throw in all sorts of things. I get especially crazy with my pecan pies, sometimes adding bourbon, rum, chocolate, different spices, all sorts of things. Pecans are such a rich nut, they can hold their own against almost anything. Mom has a fantastic recipe for a Christmas cake that's basically a kind of fruit cake without the candied fruit--it's just a very rich cake. The recipe calls for 6 eggs! I beg her to make it every year--it's an old recipe that was handed down to her from I think her grandmother. Southern, naturally--nobody does desserts like the South!

Have a wonderful, cozy, comforting Thanksgiving, everyone! Hug your family and tell them you love them!

Yesterday I spent most of the day on the train, winding its way through the beautiful New England countryside, listening to George Winston's December and Autumn. It was a lovely trip--the tracks cut through a lot of tiny towns with whistlestops, and backwoods with creeks and lakes and lots of trees, and fields with stonewalls quietly sectioning the land. Really beautiful, a very relaxing trip. I love taking the train (although it does take too long)--it gets me in the holiday mood.

We have a full house here--me, my parents, my brother Stuart and his wife, their baby and her father (who is French), and then this afternoon my brother Bart, his BF and his kids and mother. Because Bart et al. won't get here until this afternoon, we are having the Big Eat today so right now the house is redolent of turkey and stuffing. When I arrived last night Stuart made a soup of butternut squash, apple, bacon bits and chicken grease, and we had salad and cheesebread with that.

It must be said again how lovely it is here. It snowed across New England yesterday, so there's a soft layer of white across everything--the roads, the trees, the signs. My dad picked me up at the train station and we drove through the snow still falling--the headlights cut through the darkness and it was so beautiful I wanted to film it--all blackness and softwhite everywhere. This area of New Hampshire is so beautiful.

I got up late this morning--I was so rested on that beautiful old-fashioned bed that actually supported my back I didn't want to leave it--and eventually joined the family downstairs, who were playing Parcheesi. I played with my nephew William for a little bit, taking him around the house and telling him about family members in pictures on the walls. ("There's my great-grandfather, who's your great-great-grandfather, Wharton Green, who designed the subway and had an office in 30 Rock...there's your father, your uncles and I at the house in Milford...") He kind of gulped and stared solemnly at the pictures--he was listening to his Auntie. William has blue eyes and a fluff of reddish-blonde hair--he looks a lot like Stuart at his age except that Stuart had white-blonde hair until he was 12 or so.

Much better than I was last week, when I was so exhausted I was sick. Tuesday in particular was bad, and I had so much to do before I left on the train. But finally, Fare for All is over, Colin has left and my life has settled down a bit.

Thanksgiving was nice. I got there Wednesday evening and Mom and I drove around a bit doing errands. When we got home, I baked the pumpkin pie (using the pumpkin puree I'd mashed in early October). Didn't get to sleep in on The Day, unfortunately, so I wasn't as alert as I would've liked. I've noticed that when I'm really tired, it's harder for me to go to bed at a decent hour. I'm too tired to exert myself to wash my face, etc. Anyway, I did get a chance to nap. Jane, Bob, Tom and Will came over. Will was his usual geeky self, although he's progressed immeasurably in the field of social skills. He needs to learn when to let others have a say, though.

I pretty much spent most of the next few days proofreading--Carol sent me a proof that needed to be back early this week, so I stayed in and plowed through it on Friday and Saturday. Even if I didn't have that to do, I wouldn't have gotten up early in the morning to join the frenzy. Every year that bothers me more and more. I cannot conceive of spending my Thanksgiving obsessing about getting up early the next day to...shop. I mean, don't those people have family in town? Didn't they stay up reasonably late on The Day stuffing their faces with yummy turkey and gravy and stuffing, and calling distant relatives and wishing them Happy Thanksgiving? Or watching holiday movies? What in God's name would possess them to get up so early just to...shop? I just don't get it. And I don't think it's only because I'm not a morning person. Part of me really pities these people, because I think that's a terrible way to spend your holiday. But part of me wants to slap them for buying into such a stupid value system. The worst part is that it doesn't only affect them--I feel worst for the minimum wage workers who are forced to get up at 4 or 3 am in order to open the store at 5 or 6. (5:00 am. Let's really think about that--5:00 am. Unbelievable. The parking lot is full at 5:00 am. The sun isn't close to rising at that point. Their body clocks are completely messed up, they've probably dragged the kids and ruined their sleep as well--for a TV? An Elmo doll?) Of course this ruins the Thanksgiving Day of the workers as well, since they have to go to bed at 7:00 or 8:00 pm.

WalMart runs their tacky ads nonstop this time of year, and I was mocking them mercilessly this weekend. I can't stand their stupid accents, their rah-rah bullshit about "faaaamily vaaaaalyews." If they gave a shit about family values, they'd pay their workers a living wage, let them unionize and open at a decent hour on Black Friday, so their workers could actually enjoy the holiday.