Do I wake or sleep?

I'm confused--will Netflix still be offering DVDs?  Because that's all I want--I generally do not stream movies, as then I'm stuck sitting at my tiny laptop with no extras, instead of watching the movie on my huge TV, wandering around the apartment if I need to, with the option of the commentary track.

Told Tim about Rocky Horror, he is thrilled.  He looooves musicals and is always wondering when I'll do one--since I've known him, I've mostly done straight plays.  We are getting together this weekend so I'll have to explain to him exactly what kind of show Rocky Horror is so his mind is blown!

We had the RH sitz probe on Saturday, although they'd sent us the tracks the night before so I was prepared.  Afterward a bunch of us went to East L.A. in Hoboken to eat--I found out that the guy playing Brad was gay and the guy playing Frank is straight.  I really must recalibrate my gaydar, I was very surprised about the Brad-guy.  Mateo (Frank), not so much--I was surprised more because, as I said to him, "I guess I just assume that whoever's playing Frank is gay."  He responded "Tim Curry isn't." Me: "You...have an excellent point, that's a stupid assumption on my part!"  We hung out for awhile and then Steven and I left for Marie's together. On our way there I stopped at a new candy store and bought a big bag and shared it with everyone at the piano.  I wasn't sure if Franca recognized me, but not only did she, but she was mock-annoyed that I even dared to remind her who I was (I came into Marie's saying "I'm Duncan's friend?" because I don't go to Marie's all that often and I thought she might not remember me!).  Lots of fun, at one point she was playing songs from Rocky Horror, so when we did "Time Warp" I changed into my tap shoes and did the number right there on the Marie's floor, everybody loved it!

We've learned the choreography for the four big numbers ("Time Warp," "Sweet Transvestite," "Hot Patootie" and the Floor Show) and this week we learn blocking and the staging for the other numbers.  I am loving the dance numbers for this--they are very cute.  Not difficult technically but a LOT of little, cute steps that I have to drill over and over.

On the subject of Duncan's post yesterday about a Facebook-friend-of-a-Facebook-friend who tried to shame everyone into giving large amounts of money to help their mutual friend whose laptop had been stolen...a friend of mine posted last week begging for everyone to send him money.  The original comment read:

I NEED EVERYONE'S HELP. This is an experiment/ test to see if I can rely on friends in a time of need. I would like everyone to see if they could send me $5. (10/ 20?) I'm not kidding. What's $5 (10/ 20) to you? But, collectively, it could help save me in a time of desperation. I am moments away from being evicted, filing for bankruptcy, and being homeless.
My address is:
[Name]
[Address]
This is not meant to be a "pity party." This is not a joke. This is the reality of the situation. Something major happened late in 2008 that forever altered my finances. Now I'm at the end of my rope and there is no hope for a solution without the help of friends or a job that pays decent money. Please, help me save my house. I am desperate and don't know what else to do. Forward this to anyone who might be able to help.

This is an experiment?  In other words, you're just trying to see how people will react, under controlled conditions?  Because that makes it sound hypothetical, whereas the rest of the post makes it sound like a dire emergency.  Second, the blithe tone of "what's $5/10/20 to you" sits ill on me.  $20 is PLENTY.  You don't get to make assumptions about my finances like that.  Third, the "something major" that happened was...well, let's just say he made a bad choice and suffered the consequences.  As much as it sucks to lose your home, and I know he's trying, but this didn't just "happen" to him.

I have strong feelings about people who try to shame other people into giving them money (or anything) like that.  In 2008 someone who was on the R&J team (who'd asked to be on the team) suddenly and dramatically had to quit because they were "about to be evicted" but if I could lend them $2000 (they promised to pay me back) they could stay.  Oh, barf.  I hardly know you, dude, how dare you put me on the spot like that?  You ask your family and close friends for that kind of help, not just anybody.  This guy (FB guy) is an okay person, has a good heart, but he is sort of a drama queen.  Ryan and I know him from the dinner theater circuit, and when he came out of the closet (shocking absolutely no one), he made a pass at Ryan who declined.  The guy tried to shame Ryan into reciprocating saying it was really hard for him to come out, and Ryan should feel sorry for him and he was all in tears, saying "I won't take no for an answer" and oh my Lord.  Dude, that is not how sexual attraction works.  Pity is pathetic, a total anti-aphrodisiac.  In the arena of sex, you gotta deal from strength. 

And just analyzing the effectiveness of this plea--sending it to everybody, and then asking them to forward it to anybody....not a good idea.  A mass appeal like this dilutes its impact.  And forwarding it isn't going to help at all--no stranger is going to help such a vaguely worded plea for money.  Close friends and family, dude.  He reposted the original plea again this morning.

I want to be compassionate and help people who really need help--this is why dramatic people annoy me, because they abuse people's compassion.

So yesterday was the Busybusybusy Day From Hell--3 auditions, plus two temp jobs and the Spotlight On party. My last audition went over a bit so I got to the SO party late, around 10:00, by which time they were packing up. I spoke to Frank et al. (I got your makeup bag, Paula) for a bit and then decided, since it was still fairly early, to go to Marie's Crisis. It's pretty rare for me to go out by myself, but it's Marie's--obviously I didn't think anyone would hit on me. It was not at all crowded--I got a seat at the bar immediately. They were in the middle of singing "I Know Him So Well" from Chess and the pianist was trying to think of what to do next, and I suggested "Someone Else's Story" (also from Chess). He eyeballed me and said "Do you sing that?" I said yes, so I did--I should've had him take it up a half- or whole step, because it did feel a little low. Then we sang a bunch of other things--there was a sweet girl on my right and another girl across the bar who kept getting the monologues and spoken lead-ins to songs wrong. She messed up "Dance: 10, Looks: 3" AND "Nothing." There was also an extremely drunk gay guy who looked like a black-haired Martin Short who I was nice to at first, and then he started getting on my nerves. Just being loud and really sloppy. At one point, after the tip jar had been passed around, he stood very close to me and started talking about "the bitches" at one of those tables--I'm not sure why they earned that sobriquet (maybe they didn't tip?)--but I smiled briefly and turned back to the pianist. I don't want drama, I just wanna sit here and sing showtunes. It's difficult to say something in those situations because MC's is like a living room or something, very friendly and you dont't want to cause trouble, but he was really annoying and loud. I wish the bartender or someone would step in in those situations.

There was a nice gay guy named Derek sitting on my left with whom I was singing who got up after awhile and moved to to other side of the bar to get away from Annoying Gay Drunk Guy. Then a really big guy--he must've been at least 300 pounds--sat down where the other guy had been. Okay, what is it with the looking thing? This guy did not stop looking at me. There was a whole barroom full of people, including the pianist and a bunch of people across the piano, but during every single song, this guy kept looking back at me. I figured he was straight from that, and then he later proved it. The pianist started playing "Aquarius/Let the Sun Shine In" and afterward I asked if he knew "Frank Mills" or "The Flesh Failures." He didn't even know what the last one was--I had to explain to him it was the lead in to "Let the Sun Shine In" and I started singing it: "We starve, look/At one another, short of breath/Walking proudly in our winter coats/Wearing smells from laboratories/Facing a dying nation..." Fat Guy says to me "Did you do that show?" I said yes, he said "I'm sure you didn't do the nude scene." I said, of course I did. He said smarmily "Oh, I would've like to have seen that production. " Oh BARF. What the hell? Why would you say that to someone you don't know? Do you honestly feel that's appropriate repartee at a (implicitly) GAY BAR? Where a lone woman goes so she WON'T BE HIT ON? Fuck you, you Fat Fuck. You'll never get laid with game like that.

The thing is, it's really difficult to say these things, or even think them at the time. As I said, it's Marie's, it's a nice cozy place, you don't want to cause trouble. I didn't even realize how annoyed I was at this guy until later--I tried to ignore him as much as possible. Later I thought--maybe I could've said "Why would you say that?" Or even "Why are you staring at me?" (WTF is it with the staring, BTW? Do men not have a clue how annoying/disturbing that is? Newsflash--if I'm not looking back, I'M NOT INTERESTED. Get a fucking clue.)

Later, I sang "Suddenly Seymour" with the guy on my right. It felt really good, for once. That was fun.

As I started to leave, Fat Guy says to me, smarmily, "I assume you're in the business?" Ooh yeah, we're such jaded colleagues, you and I. NOT. I assume that kind of arch, smarmy facade is some sort of protection, because I'm sure the guy gets shot down all the time. I love Marie's and of course will go back, it's just annoying that I get hit on by Fat Bastard at a GAY BAR. You'd think there of all places I'd be safe.