Duck Soup

Saturday I met Alex, Don, Mickey and Dani down in SoHo to eat for free at Bun Restaurant--they were promoting their upcoming switch to around-the-clock operations by having 24 hours of free food. We had a reservation for 11 but when we got there, things had gotten badly behind. We waited about 20 minutes and were finally seated, where we found out there was ONE front-of-house guy. As in, one guy to wait on all those tables and host/seat people. He was not just in the weeds, he was one with the weeds. Kind of a Zen thing. We felt really bad for him and just sat there, waiting until he had time to see to us. He brought us water and we could see him trying to deal with other irate patrons, including the table next to us who virtually stuffed him ($2 tip--on a FREE meal, bastards). We were going to order off the special menu they had for this promotion, but the guy just started bringing over platters of nummy nummy food. MAN. I have to go back to this place, the food was amazing. I looooove Vietnamese food already (it's like a lighter, fresher version of Chinese, and it has some similarities to Thai food, with the different flavors) and this stuff was amazing. They gave us a bowl of mini-egg rolls, then we all got these duck concoctions with egg on top, then some duck shish-ke-bab things. SO GOOD. I LOVE duck, it's about the only poultry I really like, it's so fatty and rich and YUMMY. Alex, Don and I ordered beers to go with all this heavy food. Asian beers are the best--they're nice and light to balance off the food, but they still have flavor. (Unlike American light beer which, as they say, is like sex in a canoe--"it's fucking close to water!") Mmmm, duck and egg rolls and Asian beer...My one regret was that I didn't see the actual menu--I was craving some Vietnamese coffee. We didn't get to try any pho either--pho is a Vietnamese specialty, it's a beef boullion noodle soup with strips of beef in it, plus a lot of other ingredients to perk it up, like basil leaves, limes and sauces.

Dan and Mickey took off, and then Alex, Don and I eventually followed (after leaving a monster tip). We tried to wait out the rain, then decided to hit a nearby bar. After sucking down a few more drinks, the rain petered out and it was almost sunny. So we walked around Chinatown for a little bit. Chinatown is one of those really neat things that makes you glad you live in NYC. It's just fascinating--I need to get down there more, I love seeing all their weird foods in the grocery store. And their shops! So many interesting things among the tourist junk. Alex mentioned the Chinatown Ice Cream Factory--I didn't even realize there was such a thing, so we went over there and got cones. Don took off to walk the Bridge and Alex had to go to rehearsal, so I walked through Little Italy (sad, barely-holding-on, irrelevant Little Italy) to go home.

From a message board where I post

Somebody posted:

I don't think I can adequately express how much I hate reader comments, though. In my opinion, *that* is the story (and I'll read that Traister article as soon as I get a chance.) The mob mentality. The sheer unadulterated viciousness. I just absolutely hate it. I was reading a story on a newspaper website about a 29-year-old reporter who killed himself. Wouldn't you know that one of the first comments, like maybe within the first five, was someone talking about what an asshole coward he was?

This is why I really hold back on the piling on of the likes of Linday Lohan and Paris Hilton. The sheer nastiness that pervades so much public discourse now is poisonous and it bothers me. It really bothers me. I posted in reply:

I subscribe to New York Magazine which stopped running LTTE, which I really miss. I thoroughly enjoy a well-crafted LTTE; it's like a brief or a thesis to me, how can you argue your point elegantly? I've had a few LTTE printed myself and I've always been proud of that; now New York Magazine reports on the Comments section with quotations and summaries. Most of the comments are interesting--they must moderate it--but some of them make me sad. They had an article a couple of issues ago about a 15-year-old Russian girl whose millionaire father is pushing her as a fashion brand--her particular style is the basis for a chain. The girl was like any other 15-year-old--a little dizzy, naive, sweet, obsessed with pink, there was nothing objectionable about her. Some of the comments were pretty critical though and it just struck me as hitting a mosquito with a mallet. I mean, what is the point of saying nasty things about her nose? Or calling her a bimbo? She's just a kid. It's mean. She seemed very sweet nonetheless, and I just hoped she wasn't reading the comments.

Why is there so much gratuitous shittiness? So much pointless viciousness and tearing down? Why is so much of it directed toward women, and so much of it from women? Why are women so hard on starlets and why is appearance picked apart so badly? Why are women so proud of disliking other women and seem so eager to say "my best friends are all men" and "other women dislike me"? Why is it when a man cheats, he gets off easy and the "other woman" gets called a whore--and why are women so quick to use that term anyway? Why do women on the red carpet get slammed for the stupidest of things (again, usually by other women), but the men can show up in almost anything? Why is it no matter what weight a female celebrity is, it's the wrong one? Why do Paris and Lindsay get so much more attention of all kinds, but overwhelmingly negative kind, from the press? I mean, who are we kidding, there are tons of male stars out there who act just as foolishly (hello, Robert Iler, Charlie Sheen)--why do the women get so much more attention? Why did the media swarm all over Janet Jackson in the aftermath of the wardrobe malfunction, but leave Justin Timberlake mostly alone? It just all sickens me. People really depress me sometimes.

I'm glad I went to a women's college where female friendships were the norm, and not something to disavow. I'm glad that my mother and stepmother modeled healthy female friendships for me, and didn't habitually tear down other women. Sometimes I think I grew up in a charmed environment--I wasn't prepared for how nasty some women can habitually be to other women, how pointlessly competitive. I don't think it's the default setting (and it annoys me when people assume it is, "ooh, all women are catty"), but it's certainly assumed to be.