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Ugh

Listening to this freak's video that was sent to NBC, all this "you did this to me" and "see what you did"...at the risk of trivializing this terrible thing, but...man, what a whiny, pouty, disgusting sack of shit. I mean, in addition to the "Oooh, other people have money, boo hoo...oooh, my sense of manhood is 2 inches tall. Somehow it must be someone else's fault...Oooh, I can't write for shit [HOW he wasn't kicked out of a good school like Tech with that shit writing, I don't know--read his crappy play at The Smoking Gun, he reads like every one of those crap young male screenwriter/directors at film school--we've ALL auditioned for them, ladies] so I'll substitute violence for characterization, plot and theme. Oooh, some girl won't go out with my loser self so wah wah wah, I'll stalk you to show you how you *should* go out with me! Because I have a RIGHT to a girlfriend."

And this ridiculous romanticization of those fellow losers, the Columbine murderers, has to stop. All those stupid glorification sites, "Tears for E*** and D*****" are just beyond words. They were losers--"ooooh, someone was meeeean to me and I'll show them by killing lots of random passersby and clench my fists and stamp my baby feet!" Please, who *wasn't* picked on in high school and middle school? I got shit. Yes, I did. I got by in middle school (thank God for sports--that saved me socially) but I definitely dealt with my share of shit from both girls *and* boys. I was socially awkward and dorky and way too "I'll compensate for my dorkiness by pushing it in your face how smart I am!" and certainly didn't have a boyfriend in middle school. We all got shit. Everyone got shit from someone. If you can't handle it without bringing a gun to school and killing indiscriminately, you're a fucking loser.

What a fucking loser. There's no grand picture to this, no great wrong this asshole was redressing--he's just an angry fucking loser. The Angry Loser Syndrome--"I DESERVE a girlfriend, I DESERVE friends, I DESERVE to have everyone be forced to acknowledge how wise and evolved I am."

Watching CNN right now, there's a psychologist using the term "loser" in this totally emotionless, clinical way. Which is sort of funny in a horrible way, in these circumstances.

All those sweet young faces. All those young lives, those college students. Those young, young faces, all from towns so close to Falls Church. Centreville. Fairfax. Woodbridge. Richmond.

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Word.

What gets me is how the fookin' media will pound this story into the fookin ground. This morning, I can't pick up a paper, look at a website, or turn on a television without this sick nerds face pointing a gun at me.
He sent this package to NBC because this is exactly what he wanted. To become so lonely losers martyr after his death.
And that is EXACTLY what he is getting.
And who's giving it to him?
The social disease known as our press.
FRICKIN' SICK.

I was thinking that as well--I'm already sick of his nasty, bald face and tired of his stupid monotone. Why are they rewarding him this way? The Columbine murderers were on the cover of Time. It just feeds this crap.

Just playing devil's advocate, here...

I was bullied throughout grade school and high school, and largely ignored in college until my senior year. I was (and still am, in some ways ways) socially inept and awkward, and quite the loner. And I was miserable, and (I hesitate to admit this) borderline suicidal (though never homicidal. That thought never occured to me-- God bless Quaker education!). The one thing that got me through was remembering what my family, therapists, and teachers all told me: "It will get better when you're older." And as I matured and watched how other people interacted, I learned better how to fit in, until I found the supportive circle of friends I had always wanted. It took time and effort, but it was worth the wait.

But some people can't adapt. Some people don't have family who listens to them, or teachers and therapists who offer sound advice. Adolesence sucks, and some people don't have the spine to suffer through it. I look at Seung-hui, Dylan and Eric and see what I might have become if I hadn't had supportive family and teachers, and if I didn't believe everyone who told me that things would get better.

I'm certainly not excusing them or their senseless violence, but I also don't think it's entirely fair to dismiss them, either. They were stupid and hostile and I have no respect for them at all... but somewhere deep down, I do have a small sliver of pity. Dylan and Eric were bullied until they broke. Columbine High School did nothing to stop the bullies. Seung-hui was clearly socio-or-psychopathic, with a good dose of paranoid schizophrenia thrown in. He should have been institutionalized years ago, or at the very least, expelled from the college when so many people complained about his behaviour. Hindsight is 20/20, of course, but I'm quite disturbed by the lack of action on behalf of the parents and the schools to deal with the problematic students. There were warning signs everywhere, but nobody did anything to fix the problems before they boiled over.

One final side note: last week, I went to the social security office near my home to get a new card. While I sat and waited, I began talking with a mother and her overly energetic four-year-old son. When she was called up to the window, she asked if I would sit with the boy, and I gladly agreed. So we started chatting, and the boy eagerly told me that he wanted to go up to the office's security guard (who he believed was a policeman), steal his gun, kill him, and take his car. I was horrified, and told the little boy that this was a terrible thing to say. He argued, "But we have to kill him! He has a gun! He can shoot us!" The boy's mother looked over from the bullet-proof glass and said with a shrug and wry smile, "It's all those video games he plays." Apparently, the four-year-old was playing Grand Theft Auto, and learning quickly to steal and kill, and that policemen were the enemy. I'm terrified to think of what this boy does on his school's playground. Moral of story: careful the things you say. Children will listen.

Oh, I *definitely* agree schools should stop bullying to the extent they're able. Kids can be horrible and this whole online harassment just makes it worse. I get frustrated when I hear about schools who just throw up their hands and say "kids will be kids"--no, as a school, they have the responsibility to provide a safe, nurturing environment where kids can learn and not feel threatened. And yes, I agree there's a real problem with some of these games--I think they teach kids how to shoot, how to sight (although--a 4 year old? WTF is a 4 year-old doing playing GTA? Bad Parenting 101), how to see human beings as targets. But I have nothing but contempt for someone who goes to these extremes, no matter their psychological problems. Everyone, no matter how paranoid they are, knows killing is wrong. Unless they're actually psychotic and don't know who they're shooting (i.e., they think the victims are Adolf Hitler or something), they know what they're doing is wrong, which is why they hide it.

And I can't spare any sympathy for upper middle-class white boys--with every advantage in the world, with stable families--who game the courts (the Columbine killers underwent court-mandated counseling and snickered about how they lied to the therapists and said with a straight face how they'd learned their lesson, all to get out of it), make videos bragging about what they're about to do, and rig the school with bombs to maximize the number of killings. Bullied? If they actually *targeted* those whom they claim bullied them (and I've heard those claims were exaggerated), I might have some understanding. But no. They stuck their guns under desks, yelled boo and then shot those kids cold-bloodedly. They asked a girl if she believed in God, and then shot her. That has nothing to do with bullying. No, it's just an excuse in their case.

I can't say I went through what you went through but I got my share of shit. 7th grade was not pretty. But most of us go through this to some extent. Schools can't ignore physical or sexual/racial harassment, but you also can't force kids to like you, or not to ignore you. I loved how in Welcome to the Dollhouse they show Dawn turning around and dumping on her little friend toward the end of the movie. Shit flows downward. And most of us don't pull this crap. Most of us find a way to deal.

And yes, I agree there's a real problem with some of these games--I think they teach kids how to shoot, how to sight (although--a 4 year old? WTF is a 4 year-old doing playing GTA? Bad Parenting 101)

I think the problem is less about the games themselves and more about the parents who let their kids play them. My friend used to manage an EB Games store, and he'd tell me how parents would buy Grand Theft Auto for their kids all the time. He'd warn them about what was in the game, and while some of them wouldn't buy the game, others didn't care, or they'd shrug and say "He'll just play it at his friend's house."

Games have warning labels which spell out what kind of content is in the games, just like the movies. We can't sanitize the world for kids, nor should we try: there's nothing wrong with adults enjoying entertainment made for adults. It's up to parents to make sure that their kids aren't watching movies or playing games that aren't made for them.

Very true, of course. I'd forgotten about Dylan and Eric's counseling and snickering. Minus ten points for me.

And yes, most of us do find a way to deal, and those are the people who deserve respect. To a healthy mind, violence doesn't solve anything. But I would argue that these kids certainly didn't have healthy minds, far beyond the normal teenage developmental angst. Of course, as all of them underwent counseling and didn't actively work to improve their situation, I lose even more respect for them (and I didn't think that was possible. We're in triple negative digits, here). The very act of therapy is extending a hand, and if they chose not to reach out themselves and take said hand, they chose to remain in their misery, and deserve their unhappiness. My general philosophy: you don't get to complain about a situation you don't at least attempt to solve.

And out of curiosity-- where did you read that the claims of Dylan and Eric's bullying were exaggerated? I'm only curious because I remember hearing "Lighten up! We're just having fun with you!" as I was locked up in the school's theatre's tech booth (I'm very clausterphobic, so that was really scary for me). The kids didn't see it as bullying. It was just fun for them. So if the students at Columbine who did the bullying were interviewed, I imagine they would truly believe that they weren't doing anything wrong. Picking on the weak is encouraged by their peers and society-- and in some ways, perversely beneficial. If you can handle it, it toughens you up. Of course, it doesn't seem like that when you're going through it, and I certainly didn't deal with it well at the time, but in hindsight, it prepared me for the general callousness of the world at large.

Again, I don't want to seem like I'm in any way defending violence and cold-blooded murder, but I do remember my own painful adolesence, and I'm grateful that I accepted all help offered. These punks didn't. They had opportunities to get help and make things better, and chose not to. That, to me, screams "CRAZY!"

That, to me, screams "CRAZY!"

To me crazy (to the extent that it excuses anything) is used only for those who are truly psychotic--they cannot tell what reality is. These guys knew. They just didn't care. I just did a little research on those two (I refuse to name them) and apparently one of them had been diagnosed (post-mortem I believe?--diagnosed from their writings) as having a "messianic-grade superiority complex" (http://www.slate.com/id/2099203/) and a psychopath. Not psychotic--a psychopath. He knew it was wrong; he just didn't care.

I keep hearing about how supposedly they'd been bullied but I haven't heard one specific example. I haven't read any testimony from their friends (and yes, they had friends, the whole "lonely outsiders thing" *is* a myth (http://www.slate.com/id/2099203/sidebar/2099208/)--skip down to number 7 in this article) about how they were taunted with anything beyond the ordinary. There was a program on Headline news? E!? Can't remember...) about Columbine a few weeks ago and one of the students interviewed *did* say it was a myth. I see your point about how the students might minimize it themselves, but surely the killers' friends would be able to offer some evidence. I really think the whole idea they were bullied came from people who think they *must* have been horribly bullied, that's the only explanation.

I'm not at all condoning any sort of bullying, BTW--in fact I stood up to a few (for other people) when I was a kid. I could tell you some stories...I deifnitely came in for my share of scraps. The bullying I suffered was mostly girl-on-girl shittiness, although I was harassed by boys as well (this was all 7th grade stuff--I was in a new school that year--by 8th grade I'd figured out how to fit in. I was still a dork but a more acceptable one--I used humor and sports to find a place). But if it was a physical fight, I had no problem stepping in for someone else, and I did so on several occasions. I hate uneven fights of any kind, and I hate wanton cruelty--which is why I despise the Columbine killers.

People suck. Bullies suck. I'm sorry you had to deal with that.

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Ugh

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Makes me want to kill some folks and send a CD to MTV...

Re: Makes me want to kill some folks and send a CD to MTV...

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